Page 17 of The Barn: Frost and Q
So he settled in, staring at Boone.
“What?” Boone peered down at his shirt front. “Did I get paint on me or something? I was helping Jonas repaint that wall the got hit with the snowmobile. It’s warm enough now.”
“Ah, the never-ending maintenance of a pleasure club.”
“Hey, we’re a lifestyle club.” Boone made finger quotes. “Do not ruin our tax designation.”
“Yeah, yeah. Seriously, your family is that bad?”
If Boone was having any trouble following the changes of conversation, he didn’t show it. “Yeah.” He heaved a sigh. “I don’t have siblings, and my folks are gone. But I have two aunts, one great uncle, who lives at the ranch, and seven cousins. Theyall want a piece of stuff, except my great uncle, who says Mom and Dad did the right thing leaving it solely to me.”
“Damn. So it was your grandpa’s ranch then?”
Boone raised an ironic eyebrow. “Honey, we’re generation five.” He crossed his arms, his body language speaking volumes. “And they all think thatYellowstoneshow is a great model for how things should go.”
“Wow. That’s a lot of murder and mayhem.”
“Why do you think I’m in Alaska?”
It occurred to Quentin for the first time that he wasn’t the only one who was hanging out at the Barn because he was…hiding from things.
Now he had to wonder what Carson’s deal was.
A knock on the door sounded, and Boone popped up to go get it. He bit back any jealousy for how easily Boone moved. That was bitter and awful, and he didn’t want to be that.
He wanted to be Zen, but he sure wasn’t there yet. However, nothing said he couldn’t try harder.
“Ta-da!” Boone wheeled in a cart and took the cloches off the food. “Tomato soup, grilled cheese, and apple pie! They even sent a little thing of ice cream sitting in a bowl of ice. Who needs champagne when you have that?”
“Can I eat dessert first?” The pie smelled divine, all apples and cinnamon.
“Sure, buddy. So much easier to heat up soup and sammy than deal with melted ice cream.” Boone handed out the pie, joining him with it. The kitchen had sent coffee and iced tea and water, so he took coffee, because that was so amazing with pie.
Frost would tease him, because that man was a grilled cheese fiend, and he would want that and a beer.
And it was Boone’s fault he was thinking about Frost.
“Why do you think Frost hasn’t left to go work some fire?” he blurted out.
Now Boone did blink at him, ice cream container and scoop in hand. “Uh… I mean, I have no idea. Maybe he didn’t get offered a contract.”
Quentin scoffed. “He’s one of the best drop pilots in the whole country. And he’s a hell of a jumper too. Any team would want him.”
“Mmm.” Boone scooped ice cream onto the warm pie in front of him. Then he carefully did his own pie. Silently.
“You don’t think it’s me, do you? You think it’s me? Of course it’s me. I don’t want him to walk away from the life he loves for me.” There was no good there.
Boone leaned back with his pie and dug in, focusing on it. “It doesn’t always have to be about you. You spend a lot of time in here now—a crazy amount of time in here. Do you know that you’re my best friend in all the world, and I adore you, but you’re in your own head all the fucking time. And when you’re in your own head all the fucking time, everything is about you. I don’t mean that in an asshole way. You’re not getting enough input.” Boone went to take another bite, and let him stew on that for a second, before he asked, “Are you a sub?”
“Pardon me?” Had Boone honestly just asked him that?
“Look. I’m not an idiot. Hell, even if I was an idiot, this is my goddamn job. The fact is, if you need this lifestyle, you’re not getting what you need. You’re not giving anything away.”
The words stung, because they were so true. He wasn’t getting what he needed, but Frost wasn’t demanding it, either. He was terrified he couldn’t give Frost what he required, and if he couldn’t fulfill his Master, then…
He shook his head. “I don’t have anything to give away.”
“Oh, bullshit!” Boone snapped. “I’m so sick and fucking tired of that crap. You got shot, asshole. Does it suck? Yeah, sure it does. You got shot in the fucking head. But you’re functional. You’re here. You’ve got money, a man who loves you, friendswho love you. And yeah, what happened sucked. But you’re one of the most capable fucking human beings I’ve ever met. You don’t want to be a sub anymore because you don’t feel like you can lose that control? Cool, I get it. That makes sense. You don’t want to be a sub anymore because you’re mad at Frost for getting you shot, for taking that bet with that fucking bazillionaire, for having more money than God, all right. Cool. You’re just punishing Frost because you are mad at him? Okay. I don’t give a shit, but be honest. Lying is stupid and unattractive.”
