Page 69 of Trusting You
“You are totally projecting. You are too chickenshit to admit that trusting me improved your business. We both know sales are up. We both know our engagement on social media is up. This place is filled every single weekend, not to mention the events and festivals. I have this space booked through next summer. We have enough staff to keep things running smoothly, and there is even enough wiggle room to bring on a part-time bartender or two. You just refuse to admit things are going well because you have help.”
“Some of that is true, but you don’t understand the pressure I am under.”
“Then let’s sit down with the team, make a plan, and execute it. We can work through any problem if we plan ahead and work as a team. But you don’t want that, do you? You are such as asshole. You can’t admit that trusting me and giving me the reins to make changes worked. You can’t admit that you can’t do it on your own. That you need me just like you need Trent, and your brothers, and your parents. It’s okay to need people, you ass.”
Deep down I knew she was right. Deep down I knew that things had only improved once I’d stopped controlling everything. But I wasn’t going to back down from her. This business was all I had. She clearly didn’t want me like I wanted her, so I had to cling harder to the one successful thing I had built. “This has nothing to do with needing people. I’m just trying to keep everything together.”
“And don’t put this on me because you are too scared to embrace all the changes we’ve implemented or to consider launching your own distribution company. We both know it’s a great idea. We both know it would make a huge impact on the industry. But are such a control freak that you can’t get out of your own way.”
I advanced toward her, my body reacting to her anger. “Don’t talk to me like that. I am your boss. And I am the expert here.”Wrong! Wrong! Don’t wave a red flag at a raging bull, dumbass.
“Wow. I guess that’s how you really feel.” She turned around and grabbed her camera off the table and started shoving it into her backpack. “You are the CEO and you do call the shots. But respectfully, I quit. I don’t want to work in a place where I am not trusted or valued.”
She grabbed her stuff and started to make her way to the door.
“Cece, stop. We should talk about this.”
“There is nothing to talk about. You freak out about my interview, you apparently have opinions about where I keep my toothbrush, and now I’m trying to mess up your business. You are clearly trying to push me away. Congrats, you succeeded. I’m leaving.”
“I’m sorry. I am stressed. Let’s sit down and talk about this like adults.”I have to stop her. I can’t let her walk out the door.Everything was happening in slow motion and I couldn’t move my fucking feet.
“Too late, Liam. Good luck with the seniors.”
And she walked out the door. I collapsed on the couch and tried to replay the conversation. How had things gone so wrong? Why had I said those things? Why was she pushing my buttons so hard?
I looked at the ceiling and a realization washed over me. I had pushed Cecelia away. I had been scared and defensive and lashed out. And now she was gone. I had never told her how I really felt. I hadn’t told her how amazing she was and how much better she made me.
And now she might never give me that chance.
38
Cecelia
That bastard.Who did he think he was?
I thrashed around my room, packing up clothes, books, and camera equipment. Where was I going? I had no idea. But I was overcome with the urge to run away. To leave Havenport and put this entire mess behind me.
Everything hurt. I had done the one thing I promised I would never do. I opened up my heart. I exposed myself, and I got what I deserved. I had spent thirty-one years protecting my heart, and the one time, theonetime, I let my guard down, Liam Assface Quinn stomps all over it.
I was so busy raging around I didn’t even notice my mother standing in the doorway.
“Sweetie, I don’t want to push you.”
“I know you don’t.”
“But I do need to know you are okay. And if you’re not, that’s fine too. But we are going to get you better, I swear.”
“Mom, I’m fine.”
“No, you’re not. You haven’t been fine for a long time. It’s my fault. You were always my easy kid. You go along to get along and never cause a fuss. Your sister scared the shit out of me with her compulsive perfectionism and her surprise pregnancy. I never had to worry about you. But looking back, I should have paid more attention. I am so truly sorry.”
“No, Mom. Please don’t say that.”
She tried to blink back tears. “Sometimes I worry I failed you kids.”
“That’s not how I remember it. Not at all. I remember you being totally involved and positive and upbeat. You kept us moving, kept us busy. You sat and did physics with me every night junior year when I almost failed. You showed up to every game, concert, and play even though you were hurting.”
“I could have done more. I could have been stronger.”
