Page 73 of Finding You
“I know.” I felt excited, empowered, and ready to fight.
“Listen, Astrid, I am out of there. I have a career now that is solid and totally separate from Burns & Glenn. You have more to lose than I do. Are you sure you want to do this? Exercise the nuclear option?” I loved that she was worried about me. But if not me, then who would fight this fight? I didn't have kids or a mortgage. Hell, I had a trust fund from my dad. I could survive while the dust settled. If I couldn’t practice law, I'd find something else to do.
“I have to do it. I have to fight,” I replied. For so long I’d had no fight in me. I thought I wasn’t good enough, smart enough, hardworking enough. I toiled away, late nights, weekends, I missed out on the entirety of my twenties, and my sacrifices were never acknowledged. Instead I was just told it wasn’t enough and I should try harder.
But now I was older, smarter, and ready to battle. I wasn’t going to let Max Shapiro hurt other women while he collected his millions from the firm. It was illegal and unethical, and he needed to be taken down. And I knew that I was just the woman for the job.
28
ASTRID
The conversationwith Monica drained me. I wanted to go to bed for the next week, but I also wanted to see Declan and Ginger.
I walked over to his house, noting his car in the driveway, and knocked on the front door. I heard Ginger bark—she knew it was me and that made me feel amazing—and heard his footsteps.
He opened the door. “Come in.”
The house smelled amazing. I was used to being spoiled by Declan’s cooking, but the aroma of garlic and something herby filled the air and it made my stomach rumble. “What are you cooking?”
“Pasta with some fresh lobster.” Oh my God, he was the perfect man. Why was he not married yet? Hot dude who cooks and loves his dog. I should put an ad in the paper. There would be women lined up from here to Canada.
I gave Ginger a pat and took off my boots. Declan walked closer.
“Astrid, you’re shaking. Are you okay?”
“I wanted to tell you something. I just got off the phone with a woman named Monica who I used to work with at Burns & Glenn.”
I couldn’t hold it in any longer. Tears poured out of my eyes. I couldn’t control myself. Everything just came out of me. All the guilt and shame I had been carrying around. The dam broke.
Declan wrapped his strong arms around me and held me while I sobbed. He said nothing, but his presence soothed me.
I hiccupped. “It wasn’t just me. There were others. At least one and maybe a couple more.”
“Oh, Astrid.” He stroked my hair and I clung to his chest.
“I let this happen to me. It’s my fault.”
Declan pulled back and tilted my chin up to look at him. “Don’t say that. You did nothing wrong, Astrid. That place brainwashed you and mistreated you. You said no. You did the right thing.”
“No, I didn’t. I was more concerned about saving my job than protecting other women. I didn’t think. Monica has a daughter. And now she wants to fight for her.”
“That’s great news.”
“Yes. But why couldn’t I fight? Why did I slink off in shame?”
“Because you are learning, you are evolving, and you are finding your fight.”
I walked over to the couch and Declan sat next to me, his arm around my shoulders.
“We talked. She’s a mom now and started crying when I told her what happened to me. We are going to file complaints against him with the firm. He retaliated against both of us. That’s illegal. And we’re going to contact some other women who may have been victimized. And then we are going to sue.”
“I’m proud of you, killer.” He looked deeply into my eyes. “Astrid, you are one of the toughest, strongest people I’ve ever met. And maybe it took what happened to you for you to realize that. But with your strength, your grit, you can do anything. Truly anything.”
“Thank you.” And I meant it. Sitting here with him, I felt strong. I felt like I could do it.
“Is this going to hurt your chances of getting another law firm position?”
“In a fair world, it shouldn’t. But this isn’t a fair world. This is likely going to torpedo my career. At least for a few years. But I am willing to take my chances. If the firm has been covering up for his gross behavior for years, I don’t want to work there anyway.” All this time I thought it was just me. How could I be so naïve? But I was wiser now, and I wanted to make sure no other women would be taken advantage of.
