Page 110 of Wood Riddance
Sure, my happily ever after didn’t resemble the picture I’d envisioned when I was a kid. And, as I’d been doing since birth, I’d gone off script. I’d never been one to follow my family’s playbook anyway.
Finn rolled over and pulled me close, nuzzling my hair and spreading his hand protectively across my stomach. Soaking in the warmth of his touch, I closed my eyes. This was real. It was happening.
I couldn’t ignore it, especially when he was kissing my still flat belly and talking to the baby. “We love you so much,” he murmured into my skin. “You and your big sister Merry are the best things to ever happen to me. I can’t wait to meet you.” He said some variation of the same thing every morning, despite my explaining that the baby’s hearing hadn’t even developed yet.
He was undeterred and so adorable. “And,” he continued, “I can’t wait to fly with you. Show you the sky.”
This should feel uncomfortable. Too much intimacy. Too much commitment. But it felt right. I was going to be a mom, and I was in love with Finn. Easy. Simple.
But the fear and the panic still woke me every night. The bone-chilling concern that this little family we were building could be in danger was robbing me of all the joy I should feel.
Over and over, my brothers had assured me that the danger had passed. That the men responsible for all the pain our family had been through were locked up. That things would be fine. But it didn’t feel that way.
I had to deal with this shit once and for all. I was a mom now. According to the app I had downloaded on my phone, the baby was the size of a blueberry, but everything had already changed for me. I wouldn’t give up until I could ensure my family’s safety.
Could I really shift and change on a cellular level? That remained to be seen. But I wouldn’t bring a child into a world of danger and uncertainty if I could help it. Nope. I was going to finish this.
It was only seven, but I needed backup and a sounding board.
“Pregnant?”
Parker reached out and steadied herself on the doorframe.
“No one can know yet,” I said, holding out a hand and gesturing for her to sit.
“How did this happen?” she asked, dropping to a chair at my kitchen table. Her eyes were wide and her mouth was ajar.
I shot her a glare.
“Okay. That was a silly question.” She licked her lips. “Is it Finn’s?”
“Yes,” I hissed. “And keep your voice down. He’s asleep upstairs.”
She wrung her hands in her lap and assessed me. “You’re together? For how long?” There was an edge to her questions that I did not appreciate.
Now I was annoyed. “Yes. We’re together and in love.” Fisting my hands at my sides, I tried to rein in my annoyance, though I was mostly unsuccessful. “Can you please watch your tone when you speak about the father of my child?”
“It’s just—”
“Just nothing. I’m asking you, as my best friend, to support me right now.”
She stood and padded over to me, her arms open wide. “I’m sorry. I do support you. It’s only that I love you so much and I worry about you.” And then she was crying on my shoulder. Parker was not a crier.
“Fucking pregnancy hormones,” she cursed. “I’m a mess.”
Then I was hugging her in return, and my own tears were falling.
Parker released me and stepped back. “Jesus, we’re a disgrace.”
“I know,” I said, laughing and wiping a tear from my cheek.
“But Adele, we get to do thistogether. Our kids will be cousins and best friends.” She grinned up at me. “I assume I’m here to strategize about the family?”
“No.” I shook my head. “I need your help with something else.”
I poured two mugs of tea and brought them to the table.
She studied me while I got situated in the chair beside her, taking my time to compose myself. I’d spent all night thinking and analyzing. I couldn’t live my life looking over my shoulder. If I was finally getting my happily ever after, there’d be no lingering doubt, no remaining peril.
