Page 111 of Wood Riddance
“Tell me everything you know about Henri’s accident.”
She blinked at me and sat back. “We can’t go through this again, Adele. Especially now. We have more pressing things going on. Like, for example, informing your family that you’re gestating Satan’s baby. When do you plan to tell them?”
“When I feel like it,” I snapped back. “And your comments aren’t helping. I’m already dreading the shitty reactions I’m guaranteed to get from my brothers. I don’t need yours too.”
She held her hands up in surrender. “You’re right. How did he take the news?”
“God, he’s perfect,” I said, swallowing back a fresh round of tears. “Supportive and loving and thrilled about the baby.” My eyes blurred with tears despite my best efforts. So much for maintaining my composure. “He’s perfect. Susan Stephens even thinks so.”
“What? Susan Stephens? The chef lady on TV?”
I waved a hand. I’d forgotten that I hadn’t told Parker about any of that. “It’s just…” I sniffled. “I don’t know if I’m ready for all of this. To be with him publicly. To make that commitment and to start a family. This baby will be a permanent bond between us, and I’m terrified.”
“You don’t want him forever?” she asked gently, stroking my hair.
“I think I might.” My sniffles turned into full-blown sobs, and I buried my face in my hands. I wasn’t scared about impending motherhood. I would learn as much as I could and give this child all the love it would ever need. That was guaranteed. But spending my life with Finn? Being bonded to him by this child, even if things didn’t work out? That fear had settled in my bones. The sadness, the heartbreak that would come if we couldn’t make this work. The fear that my family would never accept him.
For Finn, this baby was a fresh start, physical evidence of our love. But my happiness was tinged with guilt. Because I’d be grappling with what Mitch Hebert had done for the rest of my life. Could I move on someday? Could I give Finn everything he’d need from me? Could we build our own little family together?
I desperately wanted all of those things. But first, I had to get unstuck. I had to break through the fear and the paranoia that had been holding me back for almost three years.
“I need to know there is no more danger. I need to know what really happened.” I tucked my chin to my chest and studied the tabletop. “And I need to forgive myself and finally stop carrying around all this guilt. We’ve got two Gagnon babies growing inside us right now. We can’t pass all the fear and trauma on to the next generation.”
Parker sat beside me with her mug to her lips, first surveying the dining space, then me, as if considering my words. Her eyes were steely, like she felt the same way. She and Paz had been kidnapped and held at gunpoint last year. If anyone was concerned that danger still lurked nearby, it was her.
After a long moment, she nodded.
“So we’re doing this?” I asked. “Figuring this out and ending it all?”
“Yes. But we tell no one.” She scooted forward in her chair. “Paz would shit a brick. And I want to state for the record that law enforcement is investigating this, as well as the other crimes. We have no reason to believe you or any member of your family is in danger. The Canadian drug traffickers are lying low, and there has been no recent movement.”
Parker trusted the feds even less than I did, and while I appreciated her concern for me, I needed answers.
“What aren’t we telling anyone about?”
I jumped in my seat and whipped around at the interruption. Finn was standing in the doorway wearing nothing but a pair of mesh shorts. His face was creased with sleep lines and his hair was down. I smiled at the sight of him. I couldn’t help it. He was so damn handsome, and I loved having him here in my house. It had been a place of solitude for a long time, but he brought life to it.
Parker’s eyes bulged out of her head. “We were talking about how you knocked up my best friend.” Her tone was icy.
His returning smile was filled with nothing but warmth. “I know. Isn’t it amazing?” He nodded. “Congrats to you too, by the way. The town is buzzing about your happy news.”
Parker put her hand on her flat stomach and glared at him. “If you hurt her…”
Finn waved his hands and shuffled toward the coffee maker. “Yeah, yeah, you’ll kill me, blah, blah, blah. That lecture is wasted on me.” He snagged a mug from the cupboard and filled it. “I’m head over heels in love with this one and our baby. She’s not getting rid of me anytime soon.”
He carried his mug over to the table and dropped a kiss to the top of my head.
“And since we’re plotting together, how about I make you pregnant ladies some breakfast?”
Without waiting for a response, he wandered to the fridge. He whistled while he pulled out eggs and bread and got to work.
Parker leaned forward, looking only mildly annoyed. “It’s very hard to hate him when he’s feeding us and looks like that.”
I nodded. “Yup. I tried to hate him. I tried so hard. But he’s awesome.”
“I can see that.” Parker nodded. “I’ve got your back when it’s time to tell your family. Paz will lose a testicle if he does anything but fully support you. And I’ll take care of the others too if their wives don’t get to them first.” She patted my hand. “These babies are going to be born into so much love.”
We sipped our tea and watched as my man worked his magic in the kitchen. When he was finished, Finn presented our plates with a flourish. Scrambled eggs with spinach and wheat toast.
