Page 28 of Caught in the Axe
It had been a productive day, but I’d done all my work outside the office so I could avoid Lila. Nothing could happen between us, and after I’d gotten swept up in the moment last night, I needed to put some space between us and remind myself of all the reasons I had to stay away.
So when I wrapped up with Gus, I jumped in my car and headed back to the cabin, determined to enjoy what was left of the daylight and avoid any temptation.
But of course, my solitary evening plans were dashed the moment I pulled up to the house.
Finn, who was standing on the small porch of my cabin, gave me a chin tip as I climbed out of my SUV. Gritting my teeth, I tamped down my annoyance and mentallyrearranged my evening schedule to accommodate the unexpected visit.
Of all my brothers, I was closest to Finn.
Like me, he’d left home at eighteen. He’d joined the Navy and had become a pilot. I’d visited him on occasion when he was stationed in Virginia, and he’d come to Boston several times. He’d always planned on retiring from the Navy, but when his ex and his daughter moved back to Lovewell, he’d finished up his commitment and done the same.
He’d never intended to return either, but he was a devoted dad to my niece Merry and best friends with his ex. If the move made them happy, then he’d never complain. It wasn’t Finn’s way. He had the innate ability to roll with the punches rather than tie himself up in knots over things he couldn’t control.
And since he’d returned, he’d found happiness in the most unlikely of places. Now he had fallen madly in love, had another kid on the way, and had recently launched a small business.
“You haven’t come to visit,” he said, his brows pulled low and his arms crossed over his chest. On the surface, Finn was a scary dude. He was taller than me by a couple of inches, covered with tattoos, and typically kept his long dirty-blond hair tied back in a man bun. He was perpetually dressed in jeans and flannel and carried himself with the kind of confidence only earned by serving one’s country.
But the asshole was nothing but a golden retriever on the inside.
“Been busy,” I said, carrying yet another box of filesinto my cabin.
In true retriever style, he followed me right in and kept up with the guilt trip.
“I miss you, brother. I was hoping we could spend some time together.”
I wanted that too. But right now, my head was a mess, consumed with thoughts of Lila.
We’d hugged, and I had held on too long. She had thrown her arms around me in a friendly embrace, and I’d taken it straight to Creepville, especially when I’d pressed my nose to her head and smelled her hair.
God, I was a disgrace.
I was acting like a fool.
And the worst part was that I couldn’t stop thinking about her. Like some kind of lovesick teenage boy rather than a thirty-eight-year-old man, I was desperate to see her again, to hold her in my arms and make her smile.
It had been a few years since I’d seen a therapist, but it seemed as though it was time to schedule an appointment. Clearly my mental health was on the decline.
Over and over, I agonized over how my idiot little brother had ever landed her in the first place. I couldn’t wrap my mind around it. She was so wonderful. Even worse than how he’d tricked her into thinking he was anything other than a lazy asshole was that he’d let her go.
“Miss you too, man, but I’m barely keeping my head above water with all this work.” It was a mostly legitimate excuse, right?
Finn was not impressed, nor was he accepting my reasoning. “It’s Thursday,” he said. “We’ve got to train. Go change. I’ve got boots for you in my truck.”
“Train for what?” I asked, my curiosity piqued.
“Just hurry up and get changed. The last guy to arrive has to clean up.”
Giving in to my curiosity and my brother’s adamancy, I headed into the small bedroom, unbuttoning my dress shirt as I went. I wanted to be annoyed, but for the first time all day, I found myself pleasantly distracted from my thoughts of Lila.
Whatever Finn was cooking up was probably insane, but if it could get me out of my head, at least for a little while, then I was in.
Once I’d pulled on a pair of jeans and a flannel, I headed outside, where he was waiting at his truck.
He pointed up the hill toward the large timber-style home with a great view of the mountains. Even from down here, it was beautiful. With a nod at the boots on the ground beside him, he said, “Put those on. They were Jude’s, so they should fit you.”
I eyed the worn Timberlands, then my newer New Balances. “I’m good.”
“Nah. Gotta wear a steel toe for this. You’re a thirteen, right?”
