Page 74 of Pain in the Axe
I held out my bottle of water and tapped it against her can. “Spoken like a true oldest child.”
Smiling, she leaned over to scratch Clementine’s ears. My dog had found her calling on the water. She was sitting on the bow, proudly rocking her doggie life jacket and acting like she owned the lake. Figured.
We were beginning to understand one another. As long as I made no demands, produced a steady stream of organic treats, and came home with a new squeaky toy at least twice a week, she tolerated my existence. And she’d even gotten into the habit of snuggling, but only every once in a while.
But she loved Merry, who sat next to her, her hair whipping in the wind as I drove.
Merry chatted happily about middle school social dynamics, her spring soccer season, and the hidden meanings in Taylor Swift’s new album. I soaked it all in. I didn’t get it as often as I’d like.
Time with Merry was something I’d always cherish. And the boat? It did not disappoint.
It was moments like these, speeding across the lake, with the warm sunshine on my skin, that made me love this place so much.
“So I’m gonna need the full story,” she said, handing me the bag of Swedish Fish. “Cut the bull crap.”
I scoffed. “Merry!”
She narrowed her eyes at me. “Sorry. I’m in middle school now, and once in a while, I say crap. Don’t tell my mom, okay?”
I nodded, bringing a hand to my mouth to hide my smile. “Fine.”
“But I’m not a baby. Who is this lady and why is she important to you?”
I looked at her sweet, innocent face. How could I explain all this to her in a way that made sense?
So, two decades ago, I lost the love of my life and have been in a rut ever since.
Or
I’ve wasted twenty years being miserable and doing all the things I was supposed to do instead of the things I wanted to do.
I settled on a kid-friendly version of the truth, explaining that a long time ago, I loved Chloe very much, and it didn’t work out. And now she was back, and I finally felt like my life was getting back on track.
Merry put a hand over her heart. “That’s so sweet.”
“Any day I get to see her is a great day,” I admitted. “She said she’d be taking her nieces out on the lake today. I thought it would be fun to bring you too.”
“Is she single?”
“Yes.”
Her face split in a grin. “So ask her on a date.”
“It’s not that simple.”
She nudged me in the ribs. “I’ll make you look good. Don’t worry.”
Grateful for her unwavering loyalty, I gave her a squeeze. I loved being an uncle. It was one of the best jobs in the world. For eleven years, it had just been Merry. My sassy, hilarious niece. And now we had baby Thor. Shit, I’d have such a good time with him when he was older.
For a long time, kids had been a foregone conclusion for me. I assumed I’d have a bunch. I was one of six, after all, and up here, people had big families.
I also thought I’d be the CEO of Hebert Timber by now too, so none of my plans had worked out.
Over time, the assumption, the obligation, had been replaced by a genuine desire to have a child. To be a dad. To raise tiny humans and share the people, places, and things I loved with them.
Year by year, that dream slipped farther away, yet the desire only deepened.
But I’d finally been given a chance. The circumstances were a little messy, sure, and I had some work to do to build Chloe’s trust, but I wouldn’t take a second of it for granted.
