Page 97 of Pain in the Axe
“You misunderstand me,” I said, garnering all the patience I could find within myself. “It’s not about being stuck in the past. It’s about accepting the present and being careful.”
“Careful?” He scoffed. “We’re already pregnant and trying to save a business caught between the FBI and a criminal drug cartel. I’d say we’re past being careful.”
I climbed out of bed again and paced from one side of the dark bedroom to the other. How could he not understand my point? Yes, we were getting along and had explosive sexual chemistry, but that did not mean that we could just live happily ever after.
“I’m not sure I can trust you again,” I said softly, my eyes stinging with tears.
The defeat etched in every line on his face almost broke my heart. I was hurting him. But it had to be said. We’d been dancing around our past for weeks, and it was time to lay it all out.
He lowered his head and balled his fists on his lap. “You weren’t the only one who got their heart broken.”
“After what you did?” I let out a humorless laugh. “Do you know what kind of damage that did to me? How long it took me to rebuild my sense of self? I can’t risk you doing that to our child.”
He jumped up, his eyes flashing with anger. “How could you even think that was possible? And whatIdid?” He shook his head and propped his fists on his hips. “I’ll own up to my part in this, but there were two signatures on the divorce papers, Chloe. You got on the plane.”
My heart cracked, along with my voice. “Because I had no choice. You traded me for some trees. You abandoned me and our marriage.”
“What the fuck are you even talking about?” With both hands in his hair, he tugged. “You stopped talking to me. You movedout of our apartment and wouldn’t see me. Your dad said you were going to get a restraining order if I didn’t stop trying to contact you.”
I brought my hands to my chest to ease the ache. “We got married, and you just left me. First emotionally and then physically. I had nothing and no one. You chose your company over me.”
“I did not.” He stomped two steps closer. “Why do you keep saying that? I loved my family business, that’s true, but that didn’t mean I’d choose it over you.”
“But you did.” My breath stuttered out of me. “My dad told me everything.”
Scowling, he narrowed those piercing blue eyes. “Doesn’t sound like it.”
I pulled my shoulders back and lifted my chin. “Your father bought one hundred acres from my dad. The eastern slope of Mt. Wilton. Sound familiar?”
“Lumber companies buy and sell land all the time.”
“Yes,” I said with a sharp breath in. “But your father bought it from mine at a steep discount. Said you’d be willing to walk away from me and our silly little marriage and go through with the divorce if he agreed.”
He shook his head. “No. Not possible.”
“It is,” I spit out through gritted teeth. “He forced my father’s hand. Not that my father was blameless. He wanted me to go to school, to get out of this town and away from you. My mother had always wanted me to get an education, and he worried that if I stayed married to you, I’d get stuck like she did.”
“No.” He shook his head, tugging at his hair again. “I tried to contact you so many times. You ignored me. You shut me out, because your family hated me and mine. I didn’t stop loving you. You stopped loving me.”
The panic flashing across his face made my resolve stumble a bit. My stomach flipped.
“My father begged me to leave and start the new semester,” I said, my voice a little softer. “He’d already paid the tuition. Gave me the letter you wrote. Said he wouldn’t let me give up my life for a man who didn’t truly love me.”
Gus snapped his head up and blinked. “What letter? Every letter I wrote was some variation ofI can’t live without youandI’ll love you forever.”
“I only ever got one letter, and in that one, you told me we were too young and had rushed into something we couldn’t handle. You said you needed to focus on your career and the family business. You said our fathers had agreed to the sale of land in exchange for our divorce.”
He turned and slammed his hand into the wall, and my heart cracked open wider. “No. Chloe, no. I would never have written that.”
At the utter devastation rolling off him, the ground shifted beneath my feet. Every hurt, every slight that I’d held on to for two decades was slipping away. What the hell was he saying? It contradicted everything I knew to be true. He had pulled away when his parents disapproved. He’d been desperate to impress his father.
“You were the love of my life. Even then, I’d have died for you. I didn’t give two shits about trees. I was getting ready to leave everything behind to be with you in Vancouver.”
“No.” I shook my head hard. “You said you could never leave Maine. That the family business needed you.”
“That was before we got married.” He took another step closer, his chest heaving. “That was before I realized that you were the one. That nothing else mattered. I wrote it all in my letters. I begged for another chance. I told you I’d shred the divorce papers.”
We stood several feet apart, assessing one another, hearts pounding.
