Page 104 of Clashing
“I gotta use the bathroom.”
He nodded and I scurried away like a coward. I splashed cold water on my face and gripped the counter while I sucked in deep breaths. Never in my life had I considered it possible I’d have to end things with a man who was so good. Dumping assholes, I was a pro at. But a good man? There was absolutely nothing wrong with him. Any girl would be lucky to be with him.
You’re stupid for letting him slip away.Maybe. But my heart only sang for one person, and Collin deserved more than to be someone’s second choice.
Deep breaths didn’t make my legs less wobbly when I exited the bathroom and found Collin in what used to be the dining room but was now my studio.
I froze as he thumbed through my depictions of Ryker. He lifted one and rotated it in the light. A candid of Ryker and Dan. Dan pouring a drink with a small smile hidden beneath his bushy beard. Ryker grinning back. A quiet moment they shared every time Ryker came into the bar, usually toward the end of the night when people had a few too many and started acting silly. It was too beautiful not to capture.
“Why did you call him?” Collin returned the piece to my desk and twisted toward me. “Why did you call him and not me?”
I wiped my damp palms against my jeans. “Ryker knew about my ex, and I ran into him on the way to my apartment. I figured he’d get here fastest.”
Collin scrunched his face. “That’s not why.”
No. It wasn’t why.
“I’m sorry.” I clasped my hands together and let myself marinate in the remorse I deserved. “I thought I was ready. It’s not you. You’re amazing. God, Collin, I’m so sorry. You deserve so much better.”
“Please don’t do theit’s not you it’s mething.”
“I mean it.” I twisted and untwisted my finger around a loose shirt thread. “You’re amazing. If the timing had been different, if things had been different . . .”
“You love him, don’t you?”
I sucked in a breath. “I’m sorry, Collin. I’m sincerely sorry.”
Heavy silence weighed on my chest, and I was too tired to handle it after the nightmare this week had been. Thankfully, Collin didn’t leave me drowning in it for long.
“I wish you would’ve said no to the date, but I did make it impossible. I like you a lot, Scarlett, but . . . I’m never going to be him, and he’s what you want.” He kicked at the ground. “It sucks, but I get it. What I don’t get is why you’re not with him.”
“He doesn’t want a relationship. Or, I don’t know. He didn’t before. I don’t know exactly what he wants now.” He said he could be more. The question was, what the hell did he thinkmoremeant? “When I told him I had feelings for him, he didn’t return them.”
“I wouldn’t be so sure he still feels that way. A guy doesn’t show up for a girl like that unless he cares. It’s obvious to anyone who pays attention that he’d do anything for you.”
I rubbed my arms. “I shouldn’t have started anything with you. I’m so sorry.”
“Maybe not, but I also came in pretty strong with a date you’d be too excited to refuse.” He lifted a shoulder. “It is what it is.” He pecked me on the cheek. “Take care of yourself.”
“Thanks for being nice about it.”
“I think you’ve been through enough.” He waved as he backed toward the door. “I guess I’ll see you in class.”
The door shut after him and I buried my face in my hands. If I’d met him first, I would’ve fallen hard, and he would’ve been so good for me. But I didn’t meet him first. I met my chaotic, grumpy biker, who burst into my life like a flash of lightning and left permanent marks I couldn’t forget.
Marks I saw everywhere. Especially in my apartment. Everything was clean. Not even a splinter of wood remained. No evidence Todd had been here except the new security door that was likely invented to protect a vault. Ryker even replaced my bedroom door. No remnants of my nightmare, just my own space. Safer than before.
How does anyone get over someone like Ryker?
Sighing, I abandoned my apartment and trudged downstairs. I could use a drink and comfort food. Although I anticipated Ryker would be in his usual seat, my stomach flipped when I saw him. My mom sat beside the register, next to where I usually sat. Close to Ryker.
Sitting by her meant sitting by him.How much can a girl take in one day?
Mom pulled out the seat between her and Ryker and patted it. “Who came down a minute ago?”
Massaging my temples, I sank onto the stool beside her. “Collin.”
“Oh, you should’ve told me!”
