Page 48 of Playing Dirty
Theo
My fingers tap anxiously against the steering wheel as I stare at Madden’s duplex, wondering why I thought this was a good idea.
I’ve been putting off seeing him for almost a week, hoping keeping my distance would make this attraction go away, though part of me knew it wouldn’t be that easy. Which brings me here, ready to face him and…apologize. Or at the very least, offer an explanation for my actions back in Vermont.
I’d rather have my eyeballs peeled like grapes than give him one, but here I am, doing it anyway. That’s progress, right?
Steeling myself, I knock on his front door, all the while hoping like hell he’s even home. Or that he’ll answer the door when he sees me on the other side. Between my Houdini act and the way the party went last weekend, there’s a big chance he’ll slamit—
The sound of the lock disengaging causes my heart to stumble in my chest, and when Madden appears in the doorway, it takes every ounce of grit and determination I have not to run all over again.
Madden’s brows draw down in the center when he sees me, and he quickly steps outside before allowing the door to fall closed behind him.
“Uh, hi,” he utters, unable to keep the hint of suspicion out of his tone.
“Hey,” I say, the word coming out a little more strained than I’d like. “I, uh… Do you have a second? To talk?”
“I’m not sure what we have to talk about that couldn’t have been said through a text.” His emotions are masked now, and the indifference in his tone is jarring when he adds, “Which someone generally sendsbeforejust showing up at another person’s house, by the way.”
“I didn’t think you’d respond.”
He shrugs. “You probably would’ve been right.”
The blunt truth falling from his lips causes my intestines to coil around themselves, and I want to kick myself for thinking this could go any other way than horribly wrong.
Laughing awkwardly, I motion back toward my Bronco parked on the curb. “All right, then. Um, this was clearly a mistake. I’m just gonna—”
“Go?” he cuts in, arching a brow. “Why? You’re already here. You wanted to talk.” Pausing, he motions toward me. “Go ahead. Talk.”
He leans back against his front door and crosses his arms over his chest. I track the movement, watching as his muscles ripple and flex beneath his ink-covered skin, and I have no idea how he’s not freezing out here in the cold.
I don’t let my attention linger on him too long, though, instead lifting my gaze to his face and doing what I came to do.
“I wanted to apologize for what happened over break.”
He laughs, his head falling back against the door. “God, I’m getting really sick of hearing those words coming from you.”
That makes two of us.
His head bobs a couple times before he asks, “I’m assuming this is about the part where you left me harder than granite in the hot tub and just disappeared into the ether?”
I wince, realizing this definitely isn’t going to be one of those forgive-and-forgetsituations.
“Uh, yeah, I guess,” I offer helplessly, feeling the words get stuck on my tongue as I attempt to speak. “I…I don’t know what’s happening, okay? Because I didn’t…and before we…”
God, why is this so hard?
I’m not one to get flustered and fumble over my words, but the way he’s staring at me, like I’m little more than cellophane, is unnerving.
I blow out a sharp breath and rake my fingers through my hair, doing my best to collect my thoughts. “What happened isn’t something I expected, okay? It’s still taking me a second to wrap my head around it.”
A flicker of understanding crosses his face, softening it for the briefest moment, before it’s gone. Back to an impassive expression, only to utter a simple, emotionless, “Okay.”
“Okay?” I echo incredulously.
“What else do you want me to say, Theo? You hooked up with a guy and it freaked you out—”
“I don’t care that you’re a guy,” I cut in, realizing the truth in the statement as soon as it leaves my lips.
