Page 36 of Maybe
“Fuck off, Ez,” he muttered as I swiped some mayonnaise off my own chips and repeated the finger sucking. “And stop doing that.”
“Mmm,” I hummed again, ignoring his discomfort. “Not bad.” Fucking with him some more, I flicked my eyes briefly down to his groin, then up again. “Not as good as the real stuff. But not bad.”
When I followed up with a wink, he flushed my favourite colour and busied himself digging into his fries. A twist of lust pulsed through my veins. Even the way he blushed was foreplay.
His very un-Isaaclike belch wasn’t, though. Someone had most definitely enjoyed enough booze for one night. “Home time?” I suggested, balling my burger wrapper.
“Not taking me clubbing?” He pouted. If he was anyone else, I’d think he was flirting with me, before he ruined it by almost knocking his tray off the table. “Not taking me to throw some shapes on the dancefloor?”
More like throw up. But omg. Did people still say that? Definitely time my baby bro was tucked up in bed. I wiped my hands on a napkin. “One night out on the pop and he thinks he’s Justin Bieber.”
When I stood, Isaac clumsily did the same. “Another night, perhaps. Let’s go outside for some fresh air and I’ll call you an Uber.”
A few seconds later, the ride was booked, and we were out on the pavement. Isaac swayed next to me, still grinning like a goose. Jeez, he was a lightweight.
“I’ll say goodbye then,” he announced cheerfully as he leaned in (or fell in) for a goodbye hug. “You give the best hugs, by the way, Ez. Love you.”
“Love you too, baby bro.”
His fine hair curled up my nose, smelling of beer, fries, and clean night air and the same tantalising freshness from earlier.I would have—should have—pushed him away. Except that idiot me was confident he could handle the weight of Isaac’s warm chest slumped against mine.Thou shalt not covet thine brother. Idiot me even conned himself that he could handle Isaac’s arms wrapped around my waist, pulling me closer, blissfully unaware he was treating his hip to an intimate little hug all of its own against my denim-covered cock.Thou shalt not covet thine brother.
But when mybrothereventually pulled away, and his twilight eyes, hazed with beer and so fuckingperfect, smiled into mine, idiot me forgot every fucking commandment in the book. Because when Isaac Fitz-Henry looked at me like that, I felt things I was fairly certain the bible frowned upon. Neil’s strong spliff wasn’t helping, and my last beer was followed by a whiskey chaser. Maybe I wasn’t so sober myself. So maybe kissing Isaac wasn’t such a terrible idea after all. Andmaybeif I kissed Isaac, he’d kiss me back.MaybeI could be more than simply his big brother.
And maybeMaybewould be an excellent name for my new song.
“Isaac.”
I spoke his name once, as a warning. Then, cradling that flushed face between my hands and before he could answer, I pressed my mouth to his.
Pleasure detonated as Isaac kissed me back. As a small moan slipped from his lips, my stomach flipped. I dragged him into an alley behind us, a shortcut leading to some office blocks. My heart thundered in my chest as I crowded him against the fence. Our tongues tangled. For a precious few seconds, I had Isaac beneath my hands, my sweet, innocent Isaac. As needy for me as I was for him, we shared our first kiss, around the back of a skanky McDonalds, in an alley smelling of piss and rammed with bin bags chockful of rubbish.
And yet here I was, enfolding my arms around the moment as if I’d never let it go. Everything felt so right, from the way he clung on to the way his lips opened and softened. To the way his fingers tangled in my hair, tangled through my soul.
A second later, like he’d thrown a bucket of iced water over me, Isaac wriggled out of my grasp. Wrestling me away, he staggered back as if he’d been slapped. “What the fuck, Ez?”
With a disgusted sweep of his hand, he wiped me from his mouth, then stared at his palm as if he expected a smear of dogshit. “Ez,” he whispered, softer, shaking his head. “What the fuck?”
Could I laugh it off? Diffuse the situation? Reduce it to a joke and pretend it never happened? My scuffed soul gave it a go, even as a needle of pain seared my chest, as though I was bleeding out, knifed by a mugger in this skanky alley. “What? Am I that bad a kisser? Don’t you like the taste of gherkins?”
Isaac blew out a breath, glancing up and down the alley as if contemplating sprinting down it. “Bloody hell, Ezra.” He turned back to me, rubbing his mouth. “Bloody hell.” All of a sudden, he seemed awfully clearheaded. “Why did you… you’re ruining everything. Why couldn’t you just have… why couldn’t you have kept it like it was?”
“What do you mean? Christ, Isaac, it was a quick goodbye snog after a few beers, that’s all.”
“That’s all?” he shouted. “That’s all? You’re my brother, fuckwit!”
“Only on a piece of paper, somewhere. Who gives a fuck?”
“I do!” A siren screeched past, and he yelled even louder. “I give a fuck about it, Ezra!”
Don’t raise your voice, Ezra—improve your argument.Another one of the old man’s bullshit lines, but maybe he had a point. Icing my temper, I sucked in a few breaths and counted to five. “Sorry. Okay? I’m sorry. You’re right. I shouldn’t have.I just… I wanted to make you feel better. I’ve had a few drinks, you’ve had a few drinks, and you’ve got a lot going on.”
“So you thought you’d give me another fucking problem? Thanks a bunch. And thanks for the evening out. I’ll see you around.” He brushed past me. “My Uber’s here.”
I watched him walk away from me. We did a lot of walking away from each other, me and Isaac. “Don’t say you don’t feel it too, Isaac,” I yelled after him. “Because it's bullshit. And you know it.”
CHAPTER 15
ISAAC
