Page 24 of In Death, Love Survives
“The point is, Walker is going away for good. Where no one will be able to find him when he leaves. So you shouldn’t worry about therapy.”
What in the world is he saying? They are going to take Wolfe away to some other prison, where no one will be able to find him? That is just behind comprehension. We don’t do that here.
“How is that right?”
“It’s not, but it’s not up to you and me.”
I lean back in the chair and sit there in disbelief. There’s some part of me that needs to figure out a way to help Wolfe, even if it’s only by giving him the tools I have ahead of time to be prepared.
My stomach feels like it’s in knots. I know that won’t be enough. I can’t just sit back like Ryan and pretend that it doesn’t matter.
Frankly, Ryan is acting like it’s for the best. It’s gross and sickening to listen to what he’s saying and be around him with the way he’s acting. If only I could leave without it jeopardizing my job.
“Enough about Walker. I didn’t want us to finally get together only to talk about work.”
I feel like I’m on another planet with this conversation. He’s the one bringing work up.
I try to smile at Ryan as if I’m not dreading the small talk he’s about to inflict after that start. Thirty more minutes and I can leave. I just have to make it until then without thinking about Wolfe and how to help him.
“Alright, how about you tell me what you do for fun?” he asks.
“Sure, why not?” I answer with a small smile.
“Or you could tell me about your childhood,” he suggests.
Nope. There is no way I will be doing that.
“You go first.”
“Alright,” he says with a chuckle.
Ryan starts to chat about his upbringing and doesn’t seem to notice that I’m not actually conversing back.
Even despite this awkward start to the night, the way Ryan makes me feel is unsettling. It’s the complete opposite of the way I’ve been feeling around Wolfe.
It doesn’t make any sense.
Part of me has always tried to pretend like it’s not the case, but I know Ryan has some type of romantic feelings. This excuse for drinks was exactly what he needed.
The passes he’s made have always teetered between whether he’s just being friendly or trying to get in my pants.
It’s always bothered him that I haven’t shown the same level of interest that he gets from many of the other female employees we work with. There’s just nothing romantic about the way I feel for Ryan.
On paper, Ryan is an obvious romantic candidate. He’s a doctor, smart, charming, and good-looking—all positive qualities. Yet right now, as he goes on about himself, all I feel is unease in his presence.
“Nova?” he asks.
Getting out of this daze, I feign lightheadedness.
“Sorry, it’s getting late.”
Ryan looks at his watch and then back at me.
“It’s eight.”
“Right. I just… I really don’t feel well. Thanks for tonight, but I’ll have to head home.”
“Oh, okay. Want me to drive you?” he asks, confused by the sudden change. There’s no way he realizes that he’s been talking to himself for this long.
