Page 57 of Run the Play
“This is all happening so fast. I never thought I’d be here, and definitely not this soon.”
“You’ve been here for over a year, and have been single for a while now. There is no timeline, Rowan. You have to do what feels right for you.”
“I’m scared.”
“Tell me why?”
“Because he hurt me. He took away my voice, my courage, my self-esteem. I allowed him to control my life.”
“I would never, baby.”
I nod. “I know, but—” I stop myself from confessing more.
“I’m right here. Nothing you say is going to change what I’m feeling. I’ve never wanted anyone the way I want you. I don’t bring women to my house. I don’t bring them into my inner circle. Just you, Rowan. Only you.”
He’s being open with me, and if I preach that’s what I want in a relationship, I have to be willing to do the same. Taking a deep breath, I give him my truth. “I never felt this way about him,”I whisper. “I’m scared that this time, it’s my heart that won’t recover.”
“You think I’ll break your heart?”
I nod. “You make me feel seen, Landry. You make me feel wanted and special, and for someone who grew up never feeling those things. I never had a support system, and now I do. I have friends who are mine, but they were yours first. If I lose you, I lose them. I lose my safety and my security. I’ll no longer be seen or be wanted, and I’m pretty sure that only you have the ability to make me feel special.”
“Fuck.” He wraps both arms around me and pulls me to his chest. “You are special. You’re my Rowan, my girl, and, baby, you have the power to end me. I’m laying all that I am in the palm of your hands.”
I swallow hard at his confession. “What do you want, Landry?”
“You. I want to hold you no matter who’s looking. When I call you my girl, I need to know in my heart that you understand what that means.”
“What does it mean?”
“It means that I’m yours too. There isn’t a single second of the day that I don’t think about you. It means that we’re in this together. You and me. We’re not fake, Rowan. The way you make me feel, the way I crave being around you, to touch you and kiss your soft lips. It means that we’re exclusive in this. I’m falling for you so damn hard,” he confesses.
I’ve lost my battle with my tears and wipe them from my cheeks. “I’m going to be insecure. At least for a while. I know that’s something that I need to work through.” I need to make sure he knows that I’m a work in progress. He’s healing me with each passing day, but I still want to give him a warning. Not that I think it’s going to change anything. I believe him when he tells me that it’s only me for him. My gut tells me I can trust him.
“We, Roe, somethingweneed to work through. Me and you. Together.”
I bite my cheek to keep more tears at bay. I don’t know how he does it, but his words, they heal me from deep inside in a place where I thought I’d never recover. “I really like the sound of that.”
“Me too, beautiful, me too.”
Chapter Fifteen
Landry
I’ve barely tasted her lips, and I’m all in. The physical attraction is there, but what I’m feeling for this woman goes beyond that. I know she needs time. She wants me, but he shattered her faith in men. I can be patient as long as I get to call her mine.
“Will you stay with me tonight?” I ask before I can think better of it.
“I don’t know if I’m ready for that,” she confesses.
“I don’t expect anything from you, Rowan. Your time—that’s it.”
“Okay.” She nods slowly as if she’s still trying to come to terms with what she’s decided.
“You want to finish the movie?” I ask.
“We haven’t been watching.” She chuckles.
“Good point. Come on, let’s go to bed.” I lower the leg of the recliner, and she stands, holding her hand out for me. I take it, willing to follow this woman anywhere. Standing, I turn off thescreen and lead her upstairs to my room. “I’ll get you something to sleep in,” I tell her.
