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“Yeah, but do you reallyknow?”
I shrugged. “I mean, yes, I know. But I still feel guilty.”
“Well, you shouldn’t. Not about the pregnancy stuff anyway.”
“Thanks.”
She shrugged. “What do you want me to say? You fucked up, sis. I get not wanting to tell him, but why the hell did you break up with him?”
I crossed my arms. “I was young and dumb. I couldn't tell him, so I decided to–”
“Act like a lunatic instead?”
We both chuckled. “I guess.” I blew a breath through puffed cheeks. “God, it sounds so stupid now. But it’s like the lie went on so long, it became this whole thing. The longer it went, the more I knew I could never make it right.”
“And you didn’t think he’d move back?”
I shook my head. “No. I didn’t. But here he is. And he’s just as amazing as he was then.”
“But wait, he didn’t bring this up? Surely, he had questions?”
“He was saying it was always me and he wanted to be with me again, no games. I told him I wanted to be with him, but I couldn't talk about the past and he said okay. Lately, I’ve been struggling. I do okay most of the time, but then sometimes I look at him and want to shout it out. But I don’t want to lose him again.”
Fresh tears filled my eyes and Onyx pulled me to her again. “Sis, eventually this will come out. You know that right?”
I nodded on her shoulder. “I know. But I don’t know if I can handle it. He’s going to hate me.”
She pulled back enough to look me in the eye. “I don’t know if Mike will everhateyou, but you have to let him be mad. He won’t be mad about what happened, but you have to understand he has a right to be mad that you didn’t tell him. That you pushed him away to keep your secret. He’s gonna feel shitty.”
I nodded and wiped the tears from my cheeks. “You’re right. You’reright. He deserves to be mad. I just don’t want him to be so mad that he does what I did to him.”
“Well, if you don’t want to do it tonight, I suggest telling him you’re doing laundry and resting because you’re puffy and red. He’ll know something’s up.” She grabbed my hands in hers. “Also, and I say this with so much love…fuck you for not telling me.”
I laughed and she squeezed my hands. “I’m sorry. I should have told you. Can you keep this between us for now? I gotta figure out how to tell him.”
“I am offended you even asked that.” She let go of my hands and went toward the door. “So, take out, then?”
Chapter 18
Mike
The last few days were odd. The night I went out with Jason, I messaged Jaz when I was on the way home, but she said she was exhausted and catching up on laundry. Then our shifts were all over the place again and she was going as I was coming home. She came over last night and stayed all night. She was so tired when she came in, she practically fell asleep before her head hit the pillow. I climbed in next to her and fell asleep with my arms around her, just happy to have her beside me again.
A slight movement in the bed and the little bit of sunlight peeking over my curtains had me stirring. Jaz was still next to me, but, whoa…
There was nothing between my hands and her skin.
“You sneaky little thing,” I murmured sleepily.
She moved her leg up over mine, lightly grazing my morning wood. “I’m well rested,” she said, pressing her lips onto my chest before running her tongue over the sensitive skin. Her mouth found my hardened nipple and lightly sucked.
“Mmm, I could get used to this alarm clock.” I rolled gently to grab her thigh, pulling her onto me. “Good morning,” I said as I blinked the sleep away and gazed up at her. The soft glow of sunlight streaming in created a halo behind her. My chest filled with warmth at the sight of her. “You’re so beautiful. How did I get so lucky?”
She rocked her hips gently, letting me feel her warmth and slickness without taking me inside. “Oh, so you only want me for my looks,” she teased, still gliding herself over my length.
My hands ran down her back before cupping her ass. “Yep. It has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that you’re brilliant, kind, and hardworking. Nothing at all.” I grazed her neck with my tongue, and she shuddered over me, still teasing me.
As she leaned up slightly, I took her perky breast in my mouth, rolling my tongue over her nipple. She shuddered again, so I gently sucked before moving to the other and repeating the action.
