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“I know. Shh, shh.”
Pressed to my chest, she sniffled. “Can you for–give–m–me?”
I squeezed tighter and whispered in her ear, “Yes, but can you forgive yourself?”
She squeezed me hard, sobbing onto my chest. “W–why didn’t y-you get m-madder?”
I pulled her even closer. “You hurt me, Jaz. I wasn’t mad, I was hurt. Still am, a little. Not about what happened, that wasn’t your fault, but how you handled it. I could have been there for you. You were my whole world.” I swallowed hard. “We lost all those years because you pushed me away. But I don’t want this to be the end.”
She sniffled into my chest again. “So, you don’t want me to leave?”
I pulled away and cupped her face. “Woman, I just said I love you. I’m not letting you go without a damn good fight.”
“Do you think we can get past this?” Her glassy eyes searched my face.
“Now that I know, and now that you’ve gotten it off your chest, it’s done. I don’t want to look back at what we lost. I want to look ahead to what we saved. The life we still have to live. Can you do that?”
She nodded furiously.
“And you’ll always talk to me, no matter how big or small?”
She nodded again, so I leaned down and took her mouth with mine. Emotions flooded me and tears squeezed from my eyes as I kissed her hard and she pulled me to her.
“I have a question for you.” I waited for her nod. “Can you forgive me?”
‘Mike, you didn’t–”
I stopped her. “You are not taking all the blame here. I’m sorry, too, Jaz. I’m sorry I gave up so easily. I’m sorry I was a dumb twenty-year-old boy and let you slip away. I’m sorry I didn’t fight for you. For us. And I’m sorry that I waited so long to come back for you. Can you forgive me?”
“Let’s promise to forgive each other, and forgive ourselves,” she stammered.
“Deal. But seriously, no more secrets, from either of us. We’ll share everything.” I squeezed her tightly. “I’ll carry the weight with you. No matter what it is. I love you, Jasper.”
“I love you,” she said as she pressed her lips to mine. Warmth flooded my body as bees buzzed around my stomach. “And I want you.”
Chapter 25
Jaz
I took a huge chance waiting for Mike. I needed to face it all head on. I messed it up, I needed to try to make it right. Or at least know what he was thinking. Deep down, my logical brain knew he wouldn’t be messing around with Nikki or any other woman, but my emotions were already running high, so I wasn’t thinking logically. And even though he said he needed time, I needed to know what he was thinking.
I almost went to my apartment so many times as I waited. At one point, I thought I was going to throw up.
When he said it was behind us, a weight lifted. Every bad emotion I’ve held onto and hidden for so long seemed to seep from my pores, being replaced with sheer joy. Suddenly that twenty-year old girl full of life and love came back.
“I love you, Jasper.”
“I love you.” I kissed him softly, blood and wetness rushing to my center. “And I want you.”
He kissed me hard, then lifted me off the ground and walked us to the bedroom.
I pulled my shirt over my head before he placed me on the bed. I toed my shoes off then pushed my pants down as he rushed to take his clothes off. I was working my bra off when he grabbed the band of my panties and pulled them down then jerked my body to the edge of the bed.
Heat moved through me as he dug his face between my thighs and dragged his tongue from my opening to my clit, groaning as he did. “You taste so good.”
He pressed two fingers inside me with one hand, and the other reached for one of my breasts. He kneaded it gently before rolling my nipple between his thumb and finger.
“Mike,” I moaned as my back arched off the bed at his ministrations.
