Page 32 of Defended By Bam
“Maybe in a bit. Bama brought food earlier. He keeps feeding me,” I said, rolling my eyes.
“Well, the quickest way to a man’s heart is their stomach, so they think it works in reverse.”
Beer spewed out of my mouth and Glenda giggled while Sadie said, “Mommy, you made a mess.”
Coughing to clear my throat, I grabbed some of the napkins on the table and patted at my shirt, then checked that I didn’t spit all over Glenda. “I didn’t get you, did I?”
“I’m good, love. Didn’t mean to choke you.”
Heat filled my face. “Just went down the wrong way,” I said, still coughing a little. “Sadie, we’re going out back. When you’re done you can come outside, okay?”
I opened the back door and followed Glenda outside. It was hot and humid, but it was only mildly worse than Georgia, so I adjusted quickly.
Glenda took a seat and sighed, taking a long sip from her beer.
“Long day?”
She shrugged. “Busy day. But I prefer it that way.”
“Yeah, I’m starting to go stir crazy here. But it’s not my house, so besides cleaning what’s already out in the open, there’s only so much I can do.”
“There’s plenty to do around the clubhouse. It’s pretty quiet during the day.” She leaned closer. “Honestly, it’s only crazy like the other night when they have a big party, and that’s not all the time. But I can keep your mind off stuff.”
My brows rose. “You’re a beautiful woman, but I eliminated that interest in high school. Just wasn’t for me, but I support anyone’s–”
“I didn’t mean I could fuck you into forgetting,” she said, barely able to get the words out through her laughter. “I meant you could help me clean the clubhouse or cook. I, too, tested that out and found it wasn’t for me. Although, I can look at a woman and appreciate her beauty.”
My face heated for the second time in only minutes. “I’m sorry. Just didn’t want to have any mixed signals being out there.”
“I appreciate that. So, how you holding up?”
Looking out into the yard that met heavy woods, I thought for a minute before answering. “Hard to explain. Hard to reallygrasp, too.” Looking back over at Glenda, I said, “I remember everything, and I know things are absolutely fucked right now. But also…”
She nodded, encouraging me to continue.
“Marshall never took us far, or anywhere particularly exotic, but a few times he took us camping. He’d be fishing most of the time, leaving Sadie and I to hang out at the campsite, swim, fish off the bank, build fires, and roast marshmallows.” The memories made me smile. “It was only a few days a year, and even though he was there, I was able to turn my brain off and just be in the moment. Part of me knew he’d never hurt me in such an open and public place, so I could actually relax. At least a little.”
“Disassociating.”
My head whipped to her. “You know, I never put that together, but yeah.” That made sense. Every time he had beat me, after the first few hits, I would mentally check out. I felt each blow, but in my mind, I was at the park with Sadie or at the library browsing the spines until something caught my eye. It was usually in the aftermath that everything came flooding back, replaying over and over. But only bits and pieces.
“It’s a damn shame women are conditioned to suffer, but that’s how we learn to cope and keep going,” Glenda said. Her normally cheerful demeanor faltered briefly.
“Have you ever… Do you have an abusive ex? You know what, that was rude, just ignore me.”
She waved me off. “Not rude. We’re friends now, remember?” She giggled, her lightheartedness returning. “A couple of times. And I was assaulted by my squad leader in the military.”
“You served?” I don’t know why I was shocked. Maybe because she was probably five foot two and cute as a button, but honestly, women were tough.
“I did. But finally got discharged. They did me dirty so the only way to try to move on was to leave. But that’s how I met Reggie, so I wouldn’t change a thing.”
“Oh,” I said, pleasantly surprised. “I thought you and Bama… ya know.”
She nodded. “We had an arrangement of sorts. But I never saw him like that.”
My brow furrowed. I was confused and didn’t want to sound like an ass. Maybe they had an open relationship. Or maybe it was on the side. None of which were my business.
“He’s dead.”
