Page 38 of Falling into Place
“I’ve always wondered if I would have gone into medicine if I hadn’t been good at it from the start. I love what I do and I’m glad I did, but if I’m honest I started down this path just because it was easy for me. I didn’t have anything I was passionate about back then. But what if I’d loved art? Or the idea of being a lawyer? I have zero creativity and hatearguing, so could I ever have made those work? I guess I just got lucky the thing I’m good at ended up being something I enjoy, too.”
“It’s an incredible thing to do with your life. I can’t imagine it’s easy, though.”
“It’s not. Especially in the ICU, where I have a front-row seat to people watching their loved ones slip away. There’s a lot of people I can’t save, and some days it’s hard as hell.” A shadow briefly passed over his features.
Something about that moment made her wish they were closer so she could lean into him or give him a gentle touch. It wasn’t the first time she’d wondered if the one thing Brooks Martin needed was a good old-fashioned hug.
Not your job.
She might be able to pick him up with a different question, though. “What’s your favorite part about it?”
His eyes dropped to the table while he thought, and he reached across to rub one shoulder with the opposite hand. “I love the challenge. I know I just made it sound horrible, but it can be rewarding, too. It’s a pretty cool feeling to know I have the training to take care of just about anyone and anything. I mean, when other doctors don’t know what to do and they’re overwhelmed, they send their patients tome. Sometimes on the hard days I reach for an inner strength I didn’t even know I had, and it reminds me what I’m capable of. And when I’m able to pull someone back from the brink of death, I feel like fucking Superman.”
“God, Brooks. That’s incredible.” The exhilaration on his face in that moment was palpable, and contagious.
His cheeks went pink. “Also, there’s a major shortage of intensivists. So, you know. Job security.”
“Now,thatI understand.”
A line formed between his brows. “I’d have thought accounting was a pretty solid gig.”
“Oh, it is,” she clarified. “That’s why I do it. Even though I could pick up enough clients at Mode to make similar money, it would be commissionbased and dependent on client volume, so it could change in an instant. That’s the kind of insecurity I’m uncomfortable with and why I’m eyeing one of their salaried positions. Hence, this collaboration with Sasha.”
“Ah.” He smiled softly. “Don’t worry. We’ll get you that job you want.”
“I hope you’re right,” she said. “But stop breaking character and getting us off track. Now ask me if I’ve seen any good movies lately.”
He chuckled. “So, Carly, have you seen any good movies lately?”
“At the theater? No. But my Netflix queue has gotten a lot of action lately.”
“Yeah? What kind of movies do you like?”
“Don’t laugh,” she warned, because she couldn’t think of anything but her real-life answer for this fake persona. “I’m a sucker for anything with romance.”
“Why would I laugh?”
“Because a lot of men would, I guess? A bunch of people at my accounting office went to see some rom-com together after work a couple of weeks ago, and this one guy who sits next to me said he’d rather sit through a week of finance meetings than two hours of some pathetic love story.”
“Dude sounds like a dick.”
“He is. Oh, and he also said that Hollywood love is totally fake, doesn’t exist in real life, and only gives women unrealistic expectations.”
“Wow. Imagine being a dick and so fucking wrong at the same time.”
“You may be shocked to hear this, but he’s currently single.” Carly absentmindedly toyed with the napkin in her lap as she studied him. “I gotta say, of all the things I thought you might have strong feelings about, romance films wasn’t one of them.”
“It’s not the movie thing that bothers me,” he started. “It’s this guy saying love like that doesn’t exist in real life.”
“You think it does?”
“I know it does.” Something in him changed in that moment, and for some reason it made Carly brace herself for his next words.
“It’s exactly what my parents had.”
Chapter Ten
Brooks
