Page 42 of All the Ways You Save Me
“The movie with Ryan Reynolds?” To be fair, I saw that movie like a million years ago. But I have to admit, I’ve never been able to tell those two actresses apart. “I… have no idea.”
“Exactly!” Josie yells through the phone. “And that’s just a few famous examples. Think about how many doppelgängers there are all over the world. People you see and think,That guy looks like my dentist.Just regular people with no idea that there’s someone out there with the same face.”
“Yeah, but IknewAdam. It’s not just Garrett’s face… or his body…” I heat at the memory of Garrett’s golden skin shimmering with droplets of saltwater… the warmth radiating from him as he held me against his solid chest and carried me to shore. “There’s something about him. It’s… a feeling.”
“Honey.” Her voice softens. “Are you sure you don’t justwantthere to be something about him?”
Is she right? Am I just looking for similarities because I want them to exist? “I don’t know.” I step back inside the house and lower my voice. “But I’m going to find out.”
“How are you going to do that? Stalk him? Go through his things?”
“No, of course not!” I hesitate, knowing she’s not going tolike this. “I’m going to stay for the summer and get to know him.”
“What?”she shrieks.
I quickly lower the volume of my phone.
“You’re staying for the summer?” Josie repeats.“Madeline… this is totally unhinged behavior!”
“I got a job at a local bar. Do you remember Hudson’s?”
“You got ajob?”
“Are you just going to repeat everything I say?”
“Apparently, I am. At least until you start saying something that makes sense.”
“It makes perfect sense.” Though, again, who am I trying to convince? I left my life behind and came here on a complete whim. In a way, Iwillbe stalking Garrett, watching him. What if he doesn’t come into the bar? Will I go to his house? Peer in his windows? Break in and look through his things? I’m not the kind of person who would do that. But then, a few days ago, I would have said I’m not the kind of person to come here without any semblance of a plan, blowing up my life in the process.
Yet here I am. And even more worrisome is that I don’t seem to care nearly as much as I should.
“I’m going to pretend that I don’t think he’s Adam. He’ll come into the bar… He seems to be good friends with the bartender and this other local named Ian Langley.”
Josie makes a noise like she’s choking.
“Are you okay?”
“Yeah, just… burned my mouth on my coffee.”
“Do you remember Ian? He owns a development company on the island. It used to be his dad’s before he died.”
“I remember him. He was one of those private school boys that hung out at the country club. Does he remember us? You?”
“I don’t think so.”
“Okay.”
“So,” I continue, “I’m going to get to know Garrett, try to become friends. Then I’ll look for signs, mannerisms. You can change your name and your backstory, but you can’t change who you are. I knew him better than anyone. If he’s Adam, I’ll figure it out eventually.”
“What does Jason think?”
“I…” I trail off. My plan doesn’t extend to Jason. “I don’t know what he thinks. He’s in Mexico.”
“I know you broke up, but he’s going to want to know where you are all summer.”
I slide onto a stool at the kitchen island. “Josie, this isn’t about Jason. This is about me getting closure and finding out the truth. I need to do this.”
Through the phone, I hear her long sigh. “Listen,” she says. “I have some time off. I’m going to come and meet you there. I don’t think you should be alone right now.”
