Page 54 of All the Ways You Save Me
“Not exactly… Josie was a server at the Harbor Country Club where my sailing club used to meet. We flirted and definitely had a connection, and I thought it was going somewhere. But my dad died, and then when I finally looked up from dealing with contracts and payroll and supporting my mom, Josie was long gone. Off to college, I guess.” He blows out a slow breath. “I couldn’t blame her, really. I mean, we were just kids, and she had her whole life ahead of her. Why would she want to deal with the drama of my grief and responsibilities?” His face turns wistful, and he takes another look at Madeline. “I hope Josie is doing well.”
I wish I could reassure Ian that Josie leaving abruptly and without a word likely didn’t have anything to do with his responsibilities or grief. Josie and Madeline’s family had their own drama when they took off from Sandy Harbor, one their mom isn’t talking about. But I’m not supposed to know much about that. Keeping this secret from my friend isn’t a lie but it feels like one, and it grates on me.
Chloe slips past us between tables, expertly balancing a tray of drinks on her shoulder that she unloads on the table behind us. On her way back to the bar, she props a hip against the back of a chair to chat with us.
“The new bartender seems to be working out,” Ian says, still gazing at Madeline as if he’s looking for traces of Josie in her features.
Chloe nods enthusiastically. “It’s going to be so nice to not have to work seven days a week. If she’s as competent as she seems, I might actually get a real summer with Ellery.”
I can’t help but smile when Chloe mentions her daughter. I’ve known Ellery since Chloe moved to the island when Ellery was a baby. Almost eight years later, she’s the closest thing I’ll ever have to my own kid. Chloe is a single mom who’s juggling everything on her own, so both Ian and I spend as much time with Ellery as we can, picking her up after school when Chloe has to work and taking her to the beach to teach her to surfduring the summer. Ellery is a great kid, funny and opinionated like her mom, and having her in my life is one of the best parts of living on Sandy Harbor.
Ellery is another reason why I can’t just leave this island behind. She’s never even met her deadbeat dad, who abandoned her before she was born. How would Chloe explain it to her if I took off, too? Chloe doesn’t deserve that, and Elleryreallydoesn’t deserve that. It’s just one more reason why I need to be smart about Madeline, to keep my distance, and get her out of here as quickly as possible. But then my gaze slides back to the bar. Another tendril of hair slips out of Madeline’s bun and falls around her face, and something clutches in my chest.
I am so screwed.
I meet Madeline outside the bar after her shift is over, and we walk down the beach again. The air is cooler than last night, the mid-June weather still making up its mind whether it’s spring or summer. Madeline shivers and wraps her arms around herself, rubbing her hands on the bare skin not covered by her Hudson’s T-shirt. I wish I’d brought a sweatshirt to offer her, but I’d gone home to sand cabinets in my workshop until the bar closed, and when I left, I was still warm from the labor.
“Do you want to walk on the road instead?” I ask. “There will be less of a breeze.”
“No, I’m okay.” Madeline looks affectionately out at the waves. “I want to soak up every chance to be by the ocean. I’ll miss this when I go back to teaching in Maple Ridge this fall.”
I should feel a rush of relief to hear her talking about leaving here and going back home. But all I can think about is that kiss on her doorstep last night, and how she admitted she wants to do it again. Is she thinking about that now?
The breeze from the ocean picks up, and Madeline shivers again. I reach out hesitantly, holding my arm out. “Can I sharethe warmth?” She leans into my side, and I wrap an arm around her.
“You smell like sawdust,” she says, turning her head toward me.
“Sorry, I was working before I came back to get you.”
“I like it.” She takes a deep breath in. “Sawdust and ocean breeze. They ought to make candles in that scent.” Madeline reaches up to brush a sprinkling of sawdust off my T-shirt, her fingers trailing across my chest. She seems to realize what she’s doing because she quickly draws her hand away. “Sorry.”
“I like it,” I say, repeating her words.
She presses her lips together. Yeah, she’s definitely thinking about that kiss. I could get used to this. Picking her up from work, walking her home, wrapping my arm around her and pulling her against me. I press my free hand to my forehead, feeling it heat up, and try to think of something distracting. “Do you work tomorrow?”
“The bar is closed tomorrow.” She takes a shaky breath. “I’m thinking of going to find the house where I grew up. Whatever happened to it, I think I should face it. Like you said, get closure.”
“Would you like me to go with you?”
She looks up at me, a hopeful expression on her face. I can tell she wants me to go, but she says, “I don’t want to take you from your work.”
“I just worked for four hours.” I brush another smattering of sawdust off my shoulder. “I have a few more things to finish up tomorrow morning, but I’ll be ready for a break around eleven. Does that work?”
“If you’re sure it would be okay…” Her expression turns vulnerable. “I really don’t want to go alone.”
“You don’t have to.”
We walk in silence for a few minutes, and then she says, “Tell me about where you grew up. You said it was in California? Do you get back to see your family much?”
“My parents both passed a while back. There’s not much to draw me back there.”
“I’m sorry.”
“My family is here now. Ian and Chloe. Chloe’s daughter, Ellery.”
She takes a deep breath in, lifting her shoulders, as if she’s savoring the air around us. “Well, you picked one of the best places on earth to make your adoptive home.”
“Tell me about your home.” I do my best to smooth my face into a neutral expression. I never would have imagined she’d end up staying in Maple Ridge after graduation. It’s so clear that she belongs on the beach, and if it wasn’t going to be here, why not somewhere else? “Do you like it there?”
