Page 111 of A Light in the Darkness
“What?” She laughs. “Why would I be his—?” She covers her mouth with a hand before the rest of her sentence can come. “No.”
“We know now that he isn’t but think about it.”
“I don’t want to.” She shakes her head.
“I know,” I pull her against my chest, and she resists me just enough to avoid the surgical site there, but relents anyway. “He knew what he did. You heard Addison… my father was there. Jovich was always with him. When you showed up, he probably thought you were her ghost back for revenge or something. You disturbed him. And he saw that from the first moment she saw you, Elaine recognized you, that you look like your mother. You were a problem, and Jovich specialized in getting rid of problems.”
“This is the world we’re bringing a child into?” She asks after a minute. “It feels… selfish.”
“I wouldn’t say that. It’s terrifying, sure, but the only way to drive away the darkness is with light. That’s what new life is… kids.”
She’s still a moment as she contemplates that, and then she looks out at the house before us, the exterior lights illuminating every surface so that no shadows can press in on our space. The stars are starting to punch through the blanket of night sky, adding to the cozy feeling.
“I don’t know how to be a mom.” She says, after a few moments of silence. She says it like some shameful confession, and I almost feel bad for laughing at her.
“And I don’t know how to be a dad. We’ll figure it out.”
“Maybe mine can help you.” She teases. “I’ve heard he’s a good father when he actually knows about his kids.”
“Maybe.” I agree.
To be honest, trying to imagine the senator acting as my father-in-law is weird to me. I suppose once you’ve arranged for the murder of someone’s wife, it will be weird to sit across the table from them and ask them to pass the gravy on holidays.
“Claire Massarini.” She says suddenly, her whisper heavy in the space between us. I turn sharply to her to see her nose crinkled in disgust. “No, that’s terrible.”
“Yeah, it is.” I agree.
Claire turns to me in shock. “You’re not supposed to agree!”
I only snort a laugh, amused. “You really think I’d let you take another man’s last name?” She stares at me for a long moment, shock mingling with confusion. “I don’t care if he is your father. You were born to be Claire Boudreaux… my wife.”
“Right.” She rolls her eyes, not believing me.
As if I’d let her take his name… as if I’d let her give my child any other.
“Speaking of your father,” I warn, nodding toward the front door that’s opened up, letting the foyer light spill out into the inky night. He’s striding right toward us, each step full of purpose. “I guess our time’s up.”
Chapter sixty-one
Claire
The last few months have been a blur, much the way my life has been from the very moment he came into it. Flying all around the world to finish my degree, tend to the children, check up on everyone in Costa Rica, and attend the doctor’s appointments Remy keeps setting up for me has made it all blend together.
We’ve been graduated for a month, but I have barely had a chance to breathe. It’s why I’m looking forward to a night off, with just me and Remy… and the tagalong that is a part of the equation for the next six months.
It’s weird that we’ve never had a proper date, considering I’m carrying his baby. That’s about as big a commitment as there is. I mean, I’ve given him a thousand chances to run, and he hasn’t taken any of them yet. I’ll probably give him a thousand more between now and the arrival of this little one, even though I’m pretty sure he’s intent on not taking any of them.
“You look so pretty!” Misty says, watching my reflection in the mirror as I turn, doubting my choice in dress. At just over four months pregnant, I look awkward… not quite pregnant, not fat. I don’t mind anything about this whole experience; I kind of love every minute of it… even the ones where I’m bent over the toilet with Remy rubbing my neck.
“Are you sure?” I ask, catching her eye in the mirror. “I think I look… weird.”
The top is a bit tight, and the waist clings to me so that from the front, I don’t even look any different. But when I turn to the side…
Remy has loved the changes in my body, of course.
Extra sensitivity? Increased sex drive? Bigger boobs? What’s not to like for a red-blooded man? He loves it now, but when I’m batting him away from me in a few months because I’m the size of a house, I bet he’ll be over it all too and eager for his girlfriend back.
“You look like a mom.” Misty smiles, the sides of her eyes crinkling under her purple glasses.
