Page 77 of A Light in the Darkness
When we get to the penthouse, he goes straight to the bathroom. I hear the shower begin running, rainfall on the cold tile, and then he pokes his head out from around the door frame and presents me an empty hand, outstretched, and upturned.
My feet move me toward him without thinking about it, and I place my hand in his the same way, letting his fingers close around mine to pull me after him. He’s still fully clothed, though his shoes are haphazardly dropped outside the shower stall. I step out of my own as he pulls me to him, with him, toward the shower.
And when he steps under the spray without letting go of my hand or stripping off his clothes, I make the choice to follow him in.
The water is warm as it falls upon us—not hot, not cold. It’s comfortable, peaceful, perfect. Remy uses my hand in his to pull me under the spray with him, guiding me to step right up against him.
The shower soaks his shirt, making it cling to him like a second skin, but he seems unbothered about anything in the moment. I feel my hair plastering itself against my skin, and the water sculpting my shirt to me, but it’s oddly comfortable.
I rest my head against his chest without thinking about it, letting the rain fall on my face until my eyes have to close so that I can stay there, unmoving. And Remy does the same.
I don’t know how long we stay there together, fully clothed in the shower, but I’m not ready for it to be over when he runs his fingers along my spine. I separate myself from him just enough to open my eyes and find him watching me, so I step slightly away from him to let him go if he wants.
But he doesn’t go. He sinks down to the floor of the shower, his back against the wall and his hand still holding mine. He doesn’t have to tug me down with him or make any kind of offer for meto join him. The look in his eye says enough… he wants whatever I will give him, but he wants me to give it to him.
So, I do, sinking down onto his lap and curling against him again.
We relax like that for a while more. I’m so near sleep that by the time he speaks, I can’t be sure whether it’s real or a dream. The words are a whisper, but a beautiful one.
“We can sit together in the storm or in the calm, in the dark or in the light…” I’m vaguely aware of his hand smoothing over my head, stroking water from my hair even as more cascades over us. “I’ll follow you anywhere, Claire. Everywhere. But I won’t leave you alone in the dark.”
Chapter forty-six
Remy
I can’t say whether it was the murder I watched her commit, or the shower that helped. Or maybe it was just sharing the silence with her. I don’t know what it was, but I’ll do it again and again if I have to, draw her out of that beautiful prison that is her own mind time after time if that’s what it takes to catch glimpses of the woman that I fell in love with. I’d stay forever in this little corner of our world, my patience renewed by her progress.
Unfortunately, the constant stream of unsolicited visitors destroys any chance of that possibility.
First, it’s Victor who shows up on our doorstep, desperate to speak to Claire. He’s clearly spiraling, not just because he looks like shit, but because we agreed that he needed to be careful about where he went. Just because you don’t see someone watching you, doesn’t mean they aren’t. I wrestled him out the door and after he fell apart in the hall, curled himself into a ball, and then pulled himself together, he finally left.
Then it’s Violet, who doesn’t put up much of a fight when I tell her that Claire isn’t ready to talk to her. She took it in stride, but then showed up next with Wes, as if that was going to appeal to Claire or me. If Wes told Violet about our relationship, I’m guessing he left out the finer details, like how he let her sister be tied up and accosted in a dirty warehouse.
Once I got them to leave, it wasmysister who showed up.
Rhea is the only one who I let in, and the only one who didn’t ask to see Claire. But I guess she must have heard her voice,because Claire comes out of her room and sinks into the chair, waiting to hear whatever Rhea has to say.
I overheard their last conversation, know what it devolved to, know that they haven’t spoken to one another in days… the longest they’ve gone without talking since they met. I think they each owe the other an apology, but for now, at least, I won’t insert myself into their dynamic.
“I’m going home.” Rhea explains, tugging at her bottom lip thoughtfully. “I… mean, back to school. I have finals and my degree…”
Claire nods. “Of course.”
I can tell that wasn’t the response my sister expected by the way she hesitates, her eyes flickering briefly to mine. “Are you… coming? Or…?”
“No.” Claire doesn’t have to consider it, which makes me wonder if she’s thought about this already. “I can’t, yet.” I watch her throat work to swallow, the pattern of the chain marks finally fading into a sallow yellow around the edges.
“Okay.” Rhea nods her understanding, and for a moment, the air feels heavy with all the things that none of us are saying. “Do you—do you want me to talk to your professors about a hiatus? Should I send your books or anything?”
“No,” Claire assures her. “I’ll get in touch with them and figure it out.”
This is the most I’ve heard her speak since she called me to prove the point that I don’t own her, and she can sleep with whoever she wants. That point no longer stands. I tried to deny that I cared, but I can’t deny that she owns me… maybe even more than I own her.
“Okay…” Rhea hesitates, and then her eyes turn to me. “Eli and Dimitri…”
“I know.” I assure her. “Dimitri will accompany you for the rest of the semester.”
“Thank you.” She breathes a sigh of relief, and I note the curiosity on Claire’s face. It’s a story for another time, though.
