Page 35 of Down Memory Lane
He smirked and played with her breast for a moment before he splayed her legs wide, pounding into her with his pelvis. “It’s all yours, Love.” There was that endearment again, one she hoped to hear often for as long as she could. “You can do whatever you want with it.” Leaning down, he kissed her deeply, never letting up on his pummeling of her pussy until she cried her release against his mouth.
Grabbing onto his ass, Autumn pulled him in deeper until she was coming again, watching and waiting for him to tip over the edge with her. About two seconds later, he did just that. The intensity on his face vanished as a mask of pure bliss smoothed over it in its place. Reaching up, she cupped one cheek. His eyes never closed, but stared into her as he spilled into the condom. The look of pure love in his eyes had Autumn wishing there was nothing between them so that he could fill her up completely with his warmth.
When they’d both come back down from their high, Felix kissed her lightly on the lips and slipped out. “I’ll be right back,” he told her, kissing her sweaty shoulder.
Autumn hummed and stretched, feeling muscles she’d forgotten about protesting as she did. It was a pleasurable pain, one she wouldn’t mind having more often. When Felix returned from disposing of the condom, he simply slipped into the bed next to her and pulled her over to rest on his chest. She heard the steady beat of his heart as she rested her head against him, smiling at how strong he was both physically and emotionally.
Felix had been such an immense source of support through this whole ordeal, and she was pretty sure she loved him, but there was still that nagging five percent or so that wondered if what she was feeling was merely gratitude. When Autumn gazed up at him and saw that he was staring down at her so affectionately, she felt slightly guilty at not knowing her own heart. He deserved all of her, and she would need to make up her mind sooner rather than later or risk breaking his heart.
“Let’s get some rest now.” He kissed the top of her head and pulled her in closer. “I’m not nearly done with you yet.”
Autumn smiled against his skin, trying to let the feel of his warmth beneath her keep her from straying back into her troubled thoughts. The longer she stayed with Felix, the more she ran the risk of not only breaking his heart, but her own. Was that a chance she was willing to take? When she looked at him again and saw him fast asleep, his face so happy and content, she decided that it just might be.
Chapter Seventeen
Felix
The warm, spring weather greeted Felix as he stepped out of his cider house and out into the orchard. Beautiful white and pink blossoms were scattered on the tree tops and over the ground, painting the perfect picture that would serve as the backdrop for Beckett and Willa’s wedding that would take place in a couple of weeks. Felix was happy for his brother and his fiancée, and he was pretty sure Aiden had gone ring shopping for Nicole the other day, making it seem as if love was in the air. Felix felt it too, though he’d been far more circumspect about his feelings than his brothers had. He loved Autumn before, and he was even deeper in love with her now, but there was a hesitancy about her that kept him from uttering the words. Her care for him was obvious, but whether that was love was still uncertain.
Since their first night together in Seattle a couple of weeks ago, they’d been making love and sleeping in the same bed every night, something he couldn’t get enough of and wanted to continue for the rest of his life. Most times, Autumn seemed right there with him, but others she seemed to be a million miles away, lost in thought. Felix often asked her where her mind had wandered, listening intently when she spoke of still not knowing what her future should look like.
Felix had hoped that future would include him, but she had never explicitly stated that and he was too afraid of losing what he had at the moment to ask. It was cowardly, but he didn’t care about being brave. Felix would rather live with the uncertainty as long as Autumn was still there with him. Rushing her into making a decision could drive her away completely, and he wouldn’t survive that.
Instead of dwelling on what may or may not come to pass, Felix focused on the present. At that moment, he was just finishing up a new concoction that had been inspired by the woman he loved. The idea had come to him not one day after their trip to Seattle. It felt good to be inspired, and it made Felix wonder just how interested in the idea of selling his recipes he actually was. He would still be able to create new flavors, but there was something a little sad about parting with the old ones.
What if he wanted to revisit an older recipe and try to improve it? Would he even be allowed to do that? These were questions that needed addressing, but it could wait another day or two. He was too excited to share his latest creation with the woman it was named after. With the growler of the Autumn inspired drink in one hand and two glasses in the other, Felix wandered over to her pottery studio where she had spent most of her days trying to get back to the level she had been at before. From the swear words pouring out of the open barn door as he approached the shed, it was not going well.
“Ugh,” Autumn exclaimed. The nearly completed vase crumpled as she smashed it with her hands. Felix hadn’t gotten the longest look at the piece, but what he had seen looked perfectly acceptable to him. Of course, he was a bit of a perfectionist about his ciders, so he could see why she might be frustrated with her own product. Her eyes flashed over to his and a sad smile played across her face as she gathered the lumpy clay back into a ball. “Hey.”
“Hey.” Felix nodded to the ball as he sat on a stool and rolled over to her. “Bad day at the wheel?” It wasn’t the first time he’d seen Autumn get upset at something she was working on, but what used to be a rare occurrence had been happening more often than not lately.
Autumn huffed as she smacked the clay together harder than he thought necessary, the wet slapping sounding weirdly erotic. Shaking his head, Felix concentrated on the woman in front of him and not what he wanted to do to her. “Understatement.” She crushed the clay between her fingers a while longer, her face scrunching up in frustration as she tried to blow a strand of hair that had fallen from her ponytail out of her eyes.
Setting aside the cider and glasses, Felix reached over and tucked it behind her ear for her, almost smiling at the pink as it curled forward again. “Talk to me, Auts.” He rubbed his hand up and down her arm soothingly, concerned at the despondent expression on her face. Seeing her sad and upset so often was still taking him some getting used to, but he didn’t mind her mood swings as much as he’d previously feared. How she felt was as much a part of her as anything else, and he loved each of those feelings, even the less than pleasant ones. “What’s going on?”
Autumn shrugged as she gazed at the bookcases filled with finished projects. They didn’t look as they had before her accident, and while Felix was no pottery critic, he thought the various pieces of stoneware looked amazing. “What if no one wants my stuff anymore? I was looking at my website from before and...” She trailed off as she turned to face him again, her mouth turned down in the corners and her stormy eyes shining with unshed moisture as she gulped. “I’m not as good as I was back then. What if I can’t make a living doing this anymore? What am I supposed to do?”
