Page 6 of Playing With Fire
“So, you and Ritchie,” she begins.
“I knew it,” I say shaking my head.
“I’m just curious. The two of you seem to have a very complicated relationship.”
“It’s not complicated actually. I hate him and he hates me,” I tell her.
“But why?” Selena asks.
I stare at her for a moment, contemplating whether or not to tell her.
“It’s a really long story,” I say, conceding.
“I have time.”
I launch into the story of how I first met Ritchie. He was 8 years old and I was 6. He had just been brought to the foster care home I had been staying at. My parents were not in a good place and I spent a lot of my childhood in foster care. I had overheard that he had aphasia meaning he couldn’t speak. He lost his entire family in a fire. They had just immigrated from England and there was no other family they could contact for him. He was in shock and in a lot of pain. I went to meet him and I was able to get him talking again. For a little while, he was friendly. He didn’t talk to anyone else but me and he pushed everyone else away. Then he started doing it to me too. He was just really sad and I wanted so badly to help him but I didn’t know how. Until he was adopted when he was 10 years old. After that, I didn’t see him again.
“So you don’t like him because he pushed you away when you were kids? Alex, he was probably going through a lot of pain at such a young age.”
“At that time I didn’t hate him. I was happy he got adopted. I’m pretty sure I had a little crush, but I’m never going to admit it to him,” I say with a smile.
“We met again when I was 16,” I begin.
Selena’s eyes widen. She’s probably just realizing how much history is really between us.
“I was accepted for a scholarship to attend this really prestigious school for rich kids. Ritchie was also attending the school at the time. It turned out that the family that had adopted him was wealthy so they could afford to send him there. Even then, he hadn’t changed. He was still a loner, still closed up and pushing everyone away. He was bitter and angry at the world. When I saw him again, I thought maybe it was the universe trying to tell me that I should help him. Ritchie needed healing, he needed a friend and he needed to learn how to be happy. I approached him again and it was the same old thing, he was cold to me and pushed me away. I didn’t take a hint though. I was always following him around and trying to talk to him. He ignored me for the most part, sometimes he said mean things to push me away. He recognized me from our time at foster care but that didn’t matter to him. Then one day he lashed out at me, he said I was smothering him and he needed space to breathe. He told me to stay out of his life. It hurt but I understood and I left him alone. We also had this rivalry going on. We’re both tech whizzes but Ritchie has always been better than me and I really hated that. I didn’t hate him, I just hated that I couldn’t beat him.
Meanwhile, I was getting bullied and teased a lot at school. I was the scholarship kid, the poor girl that didn’t fit in and I was a great target for getting picked on. They were rich mean kids and they really didn’t like me. It started as petty insults and jabs and all that I could handle. Then there were little pranks. Gum on my table, dead rats in my locker, you know, the usual,” I say with a bitter smile. Selena flashes a sad one in reply.
“I tried hard to ignore them and not stoop to their level but it was really hard. One day, a group of girls cornered me after school. They were holding their latest prank in a big bowl. It was maple syrup that they intended to pour all over me. I tried to fight back but I was outnumbered. Then Ritchie came along. I think he was passing by but when he saw the state I was in, he stopped. The girls asked if he wanted to join them but he refused. For a second I thought he was going to stand up to them and maybe help me but instead he left me alone. He just left without looking back. I guess I realized then how cruel he was. No matter what, I was still the one person in his life who stood by him and he betrayed me that way. That was the last straw I guess and after that I just couldn’t forgive him. He graduated before me since he was a senior and I was a junior and I haven’t seen him since, until now.”
I exhale deeply when I’m done. It felt good to get that off my chest.
“So that’s why you hate him,” Selena says and I sigh. I lie on the bed.
“What is hate really? I don’t know, I was angry for a while but sometimes I think I’m over it. But Ritchie is good at pushing my buttons. He’s the only person capable of riling me up and making me feel so many things at once,” I say honestly.
“You love him,” Selena observes.
“No,” I refute firmly.
“I don’t love him. I don’t even like the guy. He’s a jerk,” I say, not caring that I sound like a teenager.
Selena smiles.
“Regardless, all these things happened when you were kids. You’re adults now so I think you should be able to work through your issues.”
“I’m the only one always trying Selena. For once, it would be nice if Ritchie made an effort as well. He’s so good at pushing people away, it’s second nature to him now. If he doesn’t want me in his life, I’m not going to force myself there.”
“Things can change. Maybe he has,” Selena says. I highly doubt that though.
Chapter 5
(Ritchie)
______
I move to open the door of my room. On the other side is Thomas, he looks pissed and I already know I’m not going to like what he has to say.
