Page 80 of Uprooted
The hurt in her eyes was evident when I told her she had to leave. Just a few months ago, the idea of her staying here would have made me the happiest Tilak in the universe. Now, I’ve been ripped apart. I feel like I’m drowning.
This pain is what is going to fuel me. Now that she is gone and safely tucked away, I can face what will happen next.
The briefings are all the same. We are doomed. The Atorum haven’t left and are currently advancing on the base.
Tai walks into central command without a word. His hair is a mess and the lines on his face are deeper. Maybe tired? Maybe sad?
“I found Bri hiding in a cleaning bot closet. She tried to avoid evacuation,” he says.
“You weren’t on escort duty. How did you know she didn’t board?” I ask, suspecting I know the answer already.
“I was just making sure she followed orders. She is stubborn, and she hasn’t made her feelings about Earth a secret since they pulled out of the treaty. Not too hard to predict she would try to stay,” he says.
“How did Elowen do?” he asks.
“I don’t know, I didn’t see her off,” I say without looking away from the screen ahead of me. I can’t bear to look at him right now.
“What did you do?” It’s a question that sounds more like an accusation.
“Last night, I told her she had to leave. I told her she didn’t belong here and that I would personally load her on a shipping transport if she tried to stay behind.” I swallow the bile that has risen up into my throat.
“Wow. I didn’t take you for a coward. That might not even be a strong enough word for what you did,” he says.
“I know. I needed to say something to make her leave.”
“Are you going to try and fix this?” he asks.
“I don’t know that she’ll even give me a chance to explain. I avoided her all night and she left without saying goodbye.”
“I was right. It’s so much worse than coward.”
“I know.”
“At least I had the balls to look Bri in the eye while I dragged her onto the lander,” he says. That does make me look up. It’s the closest he’s ever come to admitting his feelings for Bri.
“She’ll never forgive me. She told me about twenty times,” he says.
“It doesn’t matter if they forgive us. They’re gone, for good.”
“You need to pull yourself together. The fight isn’t done. For some reason, the Atorum haven’t stopped yet.”
“I’ll fight,” I say and leave the room. I can’t be around anyone right now, even my best friend.
I move through the quiet base. Everyone moves around without saying a word. Even the bots are quiet, knowing what a somber day it is. I skirt around the quonset my family has been living in for the last few days. I’m not in the mood to deal with their prying questions. My feet take me to our room without me realizing it.
The room is perfectly clean. It’s like she was never here. I sink down onto the bed and drag her pillow over my face to inhale her scent, the only thing left of her. Taking it deep into my lungs.
I lie there, unmoving, questioning everything, doubting myself for probably the first time in my life. This is what it feels like—a lifetime of unfaltering arrogance has finally caught up with me.
I drag in every breath, knowing that this last reminder of her will disappear over time. Soon it will all be gone.
60
Elowen
I don’t believe a word Aro said. If it didn’t hurt so badly, I would laugh at how cliché it is. I remember the first time I saw this trope in a vid when I was a little girl.
A boy had a pet wolf he couldn’t keep any longer, I can’t remember exactly why. Maybe the wolf acted out… Regardless, the boy chased the wolf off, saying horrible and hurtful things. When the confused wolf finally ran off, the boy fell to his knees and cried. My mom comforted me while I cried along with the boy in the vid.
