Page 51 of The Devil You Know
I shake my head. “Kirschstein won’t like that. Our tour of duty doesn’t end until four-thirty.”
That’s verbatim what he’s told me when he saw me trying to slip out because my clinic ended early.Your tour of duty isn’t over yet, Dr. McGill!I’m a doctor, not a soldier, damn it.
“Dr. Kirschstein isn’t here today.” Lisa’s lips curl into a mischievous smile. “So I’d say our tour of duty ends whenever we want. Come on—let’s go to the mall!” When I hesitate, she adds, “What else are you going to do? Pick Leah up early and spend the next four hours begging her to pee in the potty?”
She’s got a point. Also, today is Ben’s usual day to pick up Leah. So there’s really no rush.
“Come on,” she says. “We’ve got to buy you two new pieces of clothing. And also, we’ve got to do something about your eyebrows.”
I frown at her. “My eyebrows?”
“Oh, Jane,” she says. “Please. Don’t play dumb.”
“What’s wrong with my eyebrows?”
“You know how we’re always joking about Kirschstein’s eyebrows?” She puts her hands on her hips. “Well, I hate to tell you…”
“Oh my God!” I nearly punch her in the shoulder. “I don’t have eyebangs!”
“Not yet,” Lisa says soberly. “But I feel like it’s my duty as your friend to save you from that fate.”
“I think you’re being melodramatic.”
“Friends don’t let friends have eyebangs.”
I reach up and touch my eyebrows. Okay, so they’re not as perfect as Lisa’s. But they’re nowhere near being long enough to obscure my vision like Dr. Kirschstein’s.
“Seriously though.” She grins at me. “They’re okay, but you could definitely use a shaping.”
“Nobody cares about eyebrows, Lisa.”
“Everybodycares about eyebrows.”
I sigh. “Listen, I’ll go shopping with you, as long as you shut up about my eyebrows. Okay?”
“Deal.”
I think I got taken.
Less than an hour later, Lisa and I are deep in a shopping extravaganza. Around Long Island, there are zillions of strip malls, but because it’s freezing out, we’ve decided to go to the giant mall with all the stores indoors, lined up side by side in rows that go as far as the eye can see. Also, this way we can hit up more stores with the minimal amount of walking. In the short time we’ve been here, we’ve already been inside three stores and Lisa’s lugging around two giant shopping bags. Watching Lisa shop is almost hypnotic—like watching a lava lamp.
“What do you think of this sweater?” she asks me as she pops out of the dressing room at Ann Taylor.
It’s a simple pink knit sweater. I reach over and grab the price tag. “It’s probably not worth sixty-four dollars and ninety-nine cents.”
“You get what you pay for, Jane,” Lisa says ominously. “How are those pants?”
I glance down at the straight leg black pants that Lisa picked out for me. They fall into my gray-scale wardrobe specification, but they cost eighty-seven dollars. I’m fairly sure I could get the exact same pants for thirty bucks at Target.
“They’re a little pricy,” I say.
“So?” Lisa rolls her eyes. “You’re a doctor.”
“I’m a doctor at the VA,” I remind her. “And my husband works for a crappy start-up earning basicallynothing. And I’ve got a mortgage.” Honestly, even thirty bucks for pants is pricy, especially since I’ll have to pay an extra fifteen dollars to get them shortened, considering all pants are made for Amazon women.
Lisa bats her eyes at me. “Don’t you want to look nice for your man?”
“I don’t think Ben cares if I’m wearing expensive pants.” Actually, Ben the opposite of cares if I’m dressed up. If we go out and I’m wearing something too nice, he gets all upset that I’m dressed up while he’s just wearing a T-shirt and jeans. He usually asks me in a worried voice if that means he needs to change into something “nicer.”
