Page 36 of Every Broken Promise
He didn’t come after me, not like I expected him to. Adam was sitting on the stool I had vacated, talking with Rachel. He didn’t see me coming as I punched him on his side.
Both he and Rachel turned to look at me as he started to gasp for air.
“What the hell, Astrid!”
“You’re an asshole,” I spat at him and then looked apologetically at Rachel. “Is it cool if we dip out early?”
“Of course,” she said, downing martini number two.
Adam got up, holding on to my hand to stop me from leaving.
“He’s been miserable without you. Having you back has been fucking with him. He wants to fix shit, but he doesn’t know how.”
I looked Adam dead in the eye, ignoring how my stomach dropped at his words. He wasn’t responsible for his brother’s life choices.
“There’s nothing left to fix.”
FIFTEEN
11 years old
I don’t knowwhat drove me to sneak out of the house today, but I just knew I didn’t want another sleepless night. I was feeling restless this whole week, and I knew it was due to sixth-grade graduation being around the corner.
My teacher had us write a letter to our high school selves. What we hoped to achieve, what we wanted going forward, and what we wanted to say to our friends and parents in the future.
At first, I didn’t give much thought to it.
It was just another stupid project for us to do, but then, as Astrid started to take it seriously, she began to make us sit down and write when we were supposed to be hanging out.
“What if we stop hanging out?”
Her question had been sad and slightly panicked.
“Why would we ever stop hanging out? You’re my favorite person ever,” I told her.
This made her smile, and she sat up, giving me her pinkie.
“Promise me we will never go for more than three days without talking to one another.”
The thought made me smile. She was crazy. We never went more than one day without seeing each other, and if one of us was sick, my dad drove me to her house, or her mom brought her to mine.
People had soup and rest for their sick days. We had that plus each other.
But now that graduation approached and I was looking back at where I started my schooling and how it was ending, I realized there were things we didn’t prepare for that blindsided us.
I started kindergarten holding on to my mother’s hand, and now I was going to finish elementary school with nothing but a hazy memory of her. She was gone, and I could barely remember her most days, but the ache I felt was there, and I couldn’t ever fill it.
My dad was already lying down in his room. Adam had some of his friends over, and they were playing video games. Thanks to them being loud, Dad wouldn’t notice me sneaking out. Now that he was in high school, Ezekiel went out most weekends with his friends. Dad worried about his well-being the most. He was going through a rebellious phase, or so Dad said.
I slowly made my way to the side of the house and took my bike. My stomach was anxious—not about getting caught but getting to my destination.
The streets were quiet at this time, which made it easier to navigate. The last thing I wanted was for someone to see me and go snitching on to my dad. I made sure to avoid going through the town square, which sucked because it was the easiest way to make it to Astrid’s house.
She lived on the other end from where I did.
Once I arrived at Astrid’s, I took my bike and leaned it against the fence. No one stole bikes around here, so I knew it would be fine. After that, I jumped the fence and made my way to Astrid’s window.
It took three taps for her to finally peek her head out. Astrid liked to leave the blinds a bit open so moonlight could illuminate the room. I hoped I didn’t freak her out, that was the last thing I wanted, so I patiently waited instead of just plastering my face on the windowpane and scaring her.
