Page 8 of Jingle Bell Jilt
Maggie
You promise you’ll call me tomorrow?
Cross my heart.
Maggie
Okay. I love you. You know that, right?
Yeppers! Now go to bed. You know your kids will not let you sleep in.
Maggie
You want me to send them out to keep you company?
Hahaha. Hard pass. But give them a kiss for me.
Maggie
??
I stagger into the bedroom,putting a hand to my mouth as I open for a huge yawn. I probably should have turned off the television after watchingLegally Blonde.But then I sawThe Holidayon the “Suggested for you”and I thought, Why not?Now, I know the answer to that question. Because I will be exhausted in the morning. Although, what do I really have to do tomorrow—I mean today? Lay in bed and eat ice cream? I can pretty much do that at nine am or two pm.
My tongue slides over the roof of my mouth and teeth, feeling the remains of tonight’s ice cream still lingering. I can smell the dairy on my breath. I gag a little.
With a sigh, I heft myself into the bathroom. While I couldn’t care less about removing my makeup—most of it is probably gone from crying anyway—brushing my teeth is a high priority.
I don’t take the full two minutes. But what my dentist doesn’t know, won’t hurt him.
Flipping off the light, I head for bed. I grab my Minky blanket, and I throw off the comforter ready to snuggle in for the night. Or maybe the week. I’m just playing things by ear.
Big Green—the name I have given to my neon green travel blanket—casts a soft glow in the darkness as I spread him out over the bedding.
I don’t get inside beds that aren’t my own. It grosses me out. I know, the bedspread is way worse than the sheets. And don’t get me started on the carpet. I saw a story on a news show when I was like nine where they took a black light into the room of several different hotel chains. I cannot unsee what they showed me. Like ever. Since then I have been a bit of a germaphobe, at least where vacations are concerned. I mean really, it’s surprising I travel at all after seeing that.
But that’s why I made sure to buy the XXXL Big Green. I mean, he takes up almost an entire suitcase himself, but it’s totally worth it to not be sleeping in…filth.
With Big Green positioned and my pillow replacing those that came on the bed, I kick off my slippers and crawl onto the bed. It feels like it’s a pretty good mattress. It isn’t overly firm but also not super squishy. It’s a Goldilocks mattress.
I grab the far edge of Big Green and pull him over me. Taking in a deep breath, I finally relax. I love the smell of freshly washed bedding.
I roll toward the middle and stare at the empty space. Nathan was supposed to be in that spot. I expect tears to fill my eyes, but they don’t. I think I’ve used all the expendable moisture in my body already and there’s just nothing left. Or maybe I’m just over him? But that seems unlikely. We were together for over two years.
Maybe I’m too tired to care that he didn’t bother to show up for our wedding. Or call to say that he wasn’t coming. Even a text would have been nice in a destroy-your-hopes-and-dreams kind of way.
Rolling to the other side, I stare at the bright red numbers on the clock sitting on the nightstand. 02:15. My eyes burn, but for some reason I just can’t sleep.
02:16…02:19…02:25...02:40.
* * *
I runa hand down my face, not fully out of the deep sleep I’m in. Something wet hits my forehead and then runs down the side of my face and onto my pillow. I wipe the back of my hand across it. Turning my head, my face settles onto a cold, wet spot. It takes me a moment to realize this is not right.
Plink.
A drop hits me on the temple and rolls down into my hair.
My eyes pop open, but the room is dark. Where am I? I don’t recognize the space.
