Page 35 of The Disasters of Dating
???
Wrong Number Guy
It’s phishing. Not fishing.
Isn’t that something a phisher would know?
My stomach twists, and I wonder if maybe I should have listened to my cousins.
Wrong Number Guy
Or someone who can spell.
Haha.
Wrong Number Guy
Well, I’m more of a catch and release kind of guy anyway, so it doesn’t matter. But if you want to call me something…
Maybe call me your friendly neighborhood wrong number. I’m saving the world one spelling error at a time.
What does it mean that he gave himself the same name that I gave him? My shoulders relax a fraction.
Haha. It’s not lost on me that you didn’t actually answer my question.
Wrong Number Guy
What question? What we like to be called? I did answer that.
No, not that. And don’t tell me you didn’t know what I was alluding to. If you’re not phishing, why do you keep texting me?
Wrong Number Guy
I’ve got to plead the Fifth.
If you’re not phishing why do you keep texting me?
My whole body deflates into the giant beanbag. Well, that is disappointing. Why did I get my hopes up that this was the universe? I had built him up to be more than a loser criminal.
Wrong Number Guy
Do I sound wishy-washy if I say I’m not sure? You seem fun and nice. And I don’t know. I can’t seem to help myself. But I’m definitely not trying to get any of your personal information.
I reread his response. It’s almost as if he typed out the thoughts in my head.
Wrong Number Guy
To answer your question, no, I’m not phishing. But that doesn’t mean I don’t think your sister and cousins don’t have a valid point.
You’re agreeing with them that I shouldn’t text you?
There is a pause. Have I scared him off?
Wrong Number Guy
To an extent. I mean, I think you should be cautious. You don’t even know me. For all you know, I could be some four-hundred-pound inmate named Tiny who’s serving time for peddling counterfeit purebred labradoodles across state lines. I could be a really bad dude.
I laugh at my phone screen. He sounds like Avery.
