Page 2 of Chasing Elliott
“I can’t stay long,” Everett told me sadly, giving me one last squeeze before lowering meto the ground. “I just wanted to make sure you were okay.”
“Don’t go,” I choked, gripping the sides of his hoodie. “I don’t know when I’ll see you again. I can’t lose you, Ever.”
Everett cupped my face in his hand, using his thumb to brush away the tears that had fallen in the comforting way he always had. “I’ll always find a way to see you, you know that, Elli. Mom and dad can’t stay between us forever.”
“I love you, Ever,” I told him sadly as I wrapped my arms around his waist, and he rested his chin on top of my head.
“And I love you, Elli,” he replied, squeezing me tightly as I closed my eyes.
A moment later we pulled apart at the sound of Kara calling my name. I looked up at Everett, watching through blurry eyes as he backed away before disappearing around the back of the building. I quickly wiped at my face, smoothing down my dress and taking a deep breath before turning to head back inside.
“El,” I heard Kara’s soft voice crack, my attention turning to my right as she came walking over, her eyes bloodshot. I wrapped my arms tightly around her shoulders as she buried her head in my neck.
“I’m so sorry, Kara,” I said softly, rubbing circles on her back as she cried into the crook of my neck.
About a minute passed before Kara pulled away, wiping at her eyes as she tried to forceout a laugh to lighten the mood. “Thank you for being here. It means a lot to my mom and I.”
“You don’t need to thank me,” I told her sternly, shaking my head as I wrapped an arm around her shoulder. “Where else would I be? We’re family.”
As a family member of Kara’s, an Aunt I presumed, walked up and pulled her away from me, I took the opportunity to watch people, take in my surroundings. There were flowers on every table, lilies to be exact and that alone brought yet another fresh batch of tears to my eyes. I approached the table where countless photos sat and gingerly reached out to grab one.
I smiled sadly as I looked down at the photo that was taken last year on my birthday; my mom had forgotten it was my fifteenth and Kara’s parents had felt bad and decided to take memini golfing. In the picture, Kara’s father had his arm around me in a headlock as he held his putter up in his other hand.
“That’s a beautiful picture,” I heard an elderly voice say behind me and turned to seeKara’s grandmother, on her maternal side, standing beside me with a tentative smile on her face. “He really loved you something fierce.”
“I know,” I replied honestly, taking one last look at the picture before putting it back where I had found it. “He always looked out for me, took care of me.”
She gave me a knowing smile before slowly stepping forward and placing a hand on my shoulder. “You need to know, dear, that you did nothing wrong.”
My entire body tensed, my eyes widening slightly as I stared at her in disbelief. “I don’t know what you mean.”
Kara’s grandmother gently squeezed my shoulder before giving me one last sad smileand walking back towards her daughter who was standing outside the church doors. I swallowed the lump in my throat before heading towards Kara, looping my arm through hers.“I’m with you,” I told her sternly, a loving tone to my voice. “Every step of the way.”
“Thank you,” she whispered as she stared at her mom's back who was now walking down the middle aisle towards the altar where her father lay in his casket.
She took a shaky breath before taking a slow, careful step forward, one foot in front of the other as we walked side by side past all those who sat in the pews. I noticed my mom sitting in the second pew from the front, tears cascading down her cheeks, and it pained me more to know that they were genuine; her grief over losing William had devastated her, but her concern for her best friend losing her husband was all an act.
After all, it was my mother’s fault we were even at his funeral to begin with.
I stared down at the water below, a sense of calm enveloping me as it always did when Isat on these rocks, watching the ocean waves down below that were only visible when the moon was at least half full.
It had been one year ago today; one year ago when we buried my father and with it thesecrets that I had kept with him. The horrible things that only he knew. That should’ve been arelief, a weight off my shoulders, but instead I had been pulled down deeper into the darkness, into the emotional turmoil that I often felt.
The amount of secrets, of darkness, that I’ve carried with me these last nine years was beginning to pull me under to a point where the waves crashing beneath me didn’t seem so frightening. Even though it didn’t always feel like it, I knew I still had plenty to live for.
“I saw you here yesterday, too,” a male voice said from behind me in greeting, as if thereweren’t hundreds of jagged rocks fifty feet below me that would kill me in an instant if I were to fall.
“Sounds kind of stalkerish of you,” I replied flatly, not turning around as I kept my eyes up at the moon, to the stars littering the sky.You’re my moon and my stars, Elli. Don’t forget that.I found myself smiling gently at Kara’s father’s words ringing in my ears.
They always brought me comfort, remembering the man who treated me better than my own father ever did.
“I prefer the word observant,” he stated as he sat down a couple feet away from me; closeenough where he could touch me if he extended his arm or catch me. I wasn’t quite sure if heexpected me to jump or not.
“Whatever helps you sleep at night.”
He chuckled which caused my eyes to briefly sweep over in his direction. “What brings you up here?”
The man had dark brown hair that was shorter on the sides than on the top. A dimplerested in his right cheek, defined jawline to match and what appeared to be honey brown eyes which stared at me intently.
