Page 73 of Hung Up
“An injury?”
“Being stuck in your own head.”
She leans forward, clicking off the recorder. “Did any of these thoughts happen to regard Faith and the fact that she refused to watch?”
“Possibly.” My eyes narrow ever so slightly. “Why?”
“I’m just trying to figure out what’s going on.” She sighs, sinking into her chair and placing the pen she was writing with against her chin. “She’s never kept anything like this from me before. Part of me thinks it’s because of how I handled things with Adam and she doesn’t want me ‘going off the rails’ as she so-called it, but I also wish she knew I would’ve been happy for her. Have I been a bad friend? Is that why she didn’t tell me?”
I sit up and reach for her wrist, pulling the pen away from her mouth to give her hand a squeeze. “You’re a fantastic friend, Rylie. Her best and only friend, from my observation. I truthfully think she wanted to keep it a secret just because of how much animosity there was for her toward me at first, andshe was embarrassed. That or she thought if anyone found out she was sleeping with me, it’d damage her reputation. Sleeping with someone you’re working adjacent with isn’t a good look, I imagine.”
“You make a good point.” She relaxes a little, so I let go of her hand. “So, can I ask what’s going on from your end? Because in true Faith fashion, she was very avoidant about talking about how she feels.”
I sigh, running a hand through my hair as I lean back. “I mean, I fear it’s pretty obvious where I’m at. It didn’t take long for me to start falling for her. Despite what she believes, it’s very easy to catch feelings for her.”
“I’m sure you already know this,” she starts, a conflicted expression on her face—almost like she’s worried she’s betraying Faith’s trust. “But she’s so worried about hurting you that she’s been using that as a crutch to avoid whatever it is she might be feeling. It’s actually infuriating, although I get why she’s built up so many walls.”
“Even brick walls can be torn down.”Huh, who thought I’d be sitting here quoting my mother?
“If anyone can do it, I believe you can.” Rylie grabs the recorder and stands, tilting her head toward the door. “I want to get the hell out of here and go take a nice, long soak in my bathtub. The jacuzzi in my hotel room is to die for.”
I chuckle, trailing behind her. “Do you know where Faith might be?”
“Probably back at the hotel.” She hesitates, turning to glance up at me. “Just as a heads up, she might be a little confrontational when you see her. Whenever she has to spend time with her dad, she gets a little…worked up. So, just be prepared for that possibility.”
“Please.” I laugh fully and genuinely this time. “If there’s one thing I’ve grown great at over these last couple of months, it’s handling Faith.”
27FAITH
BILLINGS
an unwelcome visitor
I’m packingup my work bag, the coffee cup from the shop in Aspen Creek that Jesse stopped at this morning, sitting on the table with his handwriting on the sleeve.
You’re the best part of my day.
It brings a smile to my face every time that I look at it. I’ve come to accept my circumstances. I’m done fighting it and feeling guilty about the decisions I’ve made. Will I still feel guilty when all is said and done? Absolutely. But for now, I’m just going to live in the moment and enjoy Jesse Hayes for the remaining time I have him.
But I will admit being in Aspen Creek with him made me see him differently in a way that makes my feelings a little more complicated.
There’s a certain comfort that being at home brings you, and it was glaringly evident that he’s most at peace on his family’s ranch. Seeing him like that, so at ease, laid back, and totally inhis element, brought an onslaught of emotions rushing through me.
I was a little bit envious, a tiny bit upset, and a whole lot disappointed.
Envious because he gets to feel that way every time he goes home. Whereas when I go home, I maybe only relax a tenth of what he does. Upset because I know that will be the last time I ever step foot on that ranch and experience such a beautiful landscape and peaceful way of life. And disappointed I’ll have nothing but a memory of Jesse in that capacity.
Which is most likely why I woke up crying from the dream I had last night.
It had started with Jesse waking me up with breakfast in bed, and when I rolled over, I noticed there was a photo of us resting on my nightstand from what appeared to be our wedding, and when I looked down at my hand, there was a beautiful oval diamond resting on my finger. Once we finished breakfast, he had to go help his brother, so I went to the main house and baked with Loretta for a couple of hours before Stevie came to grab me and took me horseback riding through the mountains. Upon our return home, Jesse was waiting for me and brought me back to his house—our house—for a nice, homemade dinner before we ended the evening on a blanket in the backyard gazing up at the stars.
It truthfully was the first dream I’ve ever had of him in that way, and it was overwhelming to say the least. Was this god’s way of trying to tell me that there’s a different ending to this than I thought? Is my brain trying to prove that I could have it so much better? Could it be both? Either way, I’ve been a confused mess this morning.
But one thing is for certain: I’m not walking away from him before I have to.
I’m just about to zip my bag and head to the arena when there’s a knock on my door. My brows furrow as I glance down at my phone, no texts from Rylie, Jesse, or even Kai stating they would be swinging by. Straightening my lace white top, I walk over to the door, not bothering to look through the peephole before I pull the door open, but once I do, God, do I wish I had.
Because in the hallway stands my father.
