Page 58 of Duress
“I wantyou, Everly. Just you. If you want kids, I’ll gladly give them to you. If you don’t, then that’s fine too. All I need is you.”
His words cause my lungs to stop functioning. I was so scared he would say he wanted kids. That they would complete him. That I wouldn’t be able to give him something he desperately wanted. It takes a long, long, moment for my brain to process his answer, for relief to replace the fear.
“Do you want kids, Ever? I’ll put a baby in you right now. If you don’t, I’ll call and make an appointment to get snipped. Just say the word.” I choke out a laugh at his offer. This man. He is so fucking perfect.
“I can’t have kids. At least, I don’t think I can. Bryce and I tried for years but nothing ever came of it. ‘Unexplained infertility’, the doctors called it. Neither of us seemed to want them badly enough to pursue the more invasive options, and Bryce wasn’t open to adoption.” Dane’s eyes soften at my confession. He doesn’t speak; he just lets me get this one last secret off of my chest.
“I’m almost forty now, Dane. My eggs, if they’re viable, are considered geriatric in maternal fetal medicine. And honestly…I don’t know if I do want to be pregnant at this stage of my life. I’m finally figuring out who I am, and…I’m enjoying that. I’m enjoying the life I want to live.”
Dane shrugs and shoots me a lopsided grin. “Okay, so no babies then.” I can’t believe this conversation is going sosmoothly. Surely he has to have some feelings on having kids.
“That’s it? You’re fine with not having your own biological child? You’re young. You still have plenty of time to live your life and decide to be a dad when you’re ready. I don’t want to take that from you.”
“I told you, Ever. You are all I need. If you can’t get pregnant or don’t want to get pregnant, that’s not a deal breaker for me. If we decide down the road we would like kids, there’s always adoption or fostering. Or we can raise a litter of food-stealing muppet dogs if we decide we don’t have enough chaos in our lives. Please don’t feel like you are holding me back. I haven’t ever seriously considered children as a possibility in my future. It is something I’m willing to explore if and when you want to, but if it’s just me and you, I’m sure Uly will keep us on our toes.”
I laugh at his joke, more tears dampening my cheeks as the weight of his conversation lifts from my shoulders. I lean over the plate of the twice forgotten grilled cheese sandwiches and kiss Dane. It’s a soft, languorous, unhurried kiss. I kiss him like we have forever to look forward to. Because we do.
When I pull away, I finally say the words I’ve been holding back until I knew it would be safe to confess them. “I love you.”
“Fucking finally. God, Everly, do you know how long I’ve been dying to hear you say that? Fuck, I love you too.”
I laugh at his excitement as Dane tosses the plate of food onto the floor so he can pull me into his body.
He covers me with his naked hardness, settlingbetween my legs. I feel his erection, heavy and thick against my pussy, but he doesn’t move to enter me. He just revels in kissing, caressing and whisperingI love youinto my skin as he worships every inch of me. When we finally come together, it feels like the beginning of our forever.
EPILOGUE
2 YEARS LATER
DANE
“Yo, Roberts, you ready to go? I don’t want to be late!” I stand from my desk the second I finish submitting the last of my arrest reports for the day, eager to get going. I’m in a hurry. Tonight is the ribbon cutting for Ever After, Everly’s new passion project, and she will kill me if I’m late. I promised I would pick up the gluten-free, nut-free, allergy-friendly cupcakes for the reception. It’s the least I can do, since Ever has been working long hours going straight from her day job at Whispering Grove, to cleaning, organizing and painting the small building located in the heart of downtown Birch Falls, while I’ve been splitting my time between working and getting myBachelor’s in social work, with a focus in community outreach.
I look around for my partner and see her in Sargent Randall’s office. Judging by her tense body language and the jut of her chin as she stares down Randall, Serena isn’t happy. Immediately, I know this is Randall pawning a case off on her that he doesn’t want to handle. He’s been doing this for months now, sending Serena on calls that he deems unimportant and lower priority, doing his best to discourage Serena from continuing on with her career with the Birch Falls PD. Randall is old school, and he is everything wrong with our justice system. I decide to rescue Serena from Randall’s patronizing, and head across the bullpen to retrieve her.
I knock once on the door before opening it, interrupting the standoff happening between Serena and Randall. “Roberts, it’s quitting time. Ready to go?”
Randall cuts his glare toward me, clearly not thrilled with my interruption. Serena nods and moves like she’s going to follow me, but Randall speaks up, halting her in her tracks.
“Actually, I was just telling Office Roberts there is a call she needs to respond to. A man called in claiming his wife is ‘missing’. It’s probably just some dumb bastard who won’t admit his wife is cheating on him.” Randall’s tone strives for indolent and long-suffering, but I can tell there is an edge of challenge to it too. If Serena had hackles, they would be raised right now. A lesser man would be cowed by the glare she is directing his way. Clearly Randall see this assignment as beneath him and a punishment forSerena for whatever insubordination he thinks she’s guilty of.
“Shift’s over, Boss. Can’t one of swing shift guys handle it?” I interject, trying to keep the peace and get Serena out of there so she won’t miss Everly’s big night. She’s been there helping when I haven’t been able to, and I know this is as important to her as it is to me. She’s been integral in helping Everly and Bethany with the community outreach aspect of Ever After, and she deserves to be there to help celebrate.
Ever Afteris going to be a small studio that specializes in providing therapy through art for teens, young adults and women who have experienced intimate partner violence.
The idea came about after Bethany, the Director at Whispering Grove, and seed investor for Ever After, realized how well Everly’s approach of combining art with therapy worked for the residents on site, and thought it would fill a need in the community for at risk youth. Years prior, Bethany experienced the loss of a nephew to suicide after years of struggling with addiction and depression, unable to find the resources needed to help improve his mental health. Since then she had been searching for a way to help kids in similar situations. Everly also wanted to be a resource for women who had been through similar experiences to hers, so together they came up withEver After.
Mental health specialists are hard to come by on a good day, even more so when children are involved. When Everly told me about what she and Bethany wanted to do, it ignited a desire in me to do more. To really help thepeople that need it the most, and not just keep upholding a broken system built on the backs of the disenfranchised and oppressed. I went into police work because I needed a job and wanted to help, but quickly became jaded at the power imbalance and use of police resources to uphold white supremacy that has been baked into our justice system for the last century. Sure, I helped put Dominick Reeves away, but how many more of him are out there? How many more Bryce Carmichaels are out there helping men like Dominick get away with their crimes?
After a strained moment where Randall and Serena ignore my clumsy attempt to break up the tension, Serena huffs out a frustrated sigh, “Go on, Dane. I’ll catch up after handling this.”
“But—”
“I said, go on. I’ll handle this call that Sargent Randall has deemed himself too important to go on, then I’ll see you at the reception.” Serena’s tone is icy, and I know her wrath is directed at the superior officer in front of her. Serena has tried her best to talk me into staying on the force, to help her with her mission of creating change from within, to fight against men like Randall, but she has her calling and I have mine. And mine is building a brand new future with Everly while helping as many people as we can. I can see that Serena’s mind is made up, so I jerk a nod and back toward the exit, unwilling to risk being late myself. Tonight is too important, and I have more than one stop to make on the way to the ribbon cutting.
“Alright, I’ll tell Everly you’re still coming.” As I turn to leave, Serena calls out a warning.
“Don’t you dare do it before I get there.”
