Page 55 of Take Me to Church
"I would. And that's exactly why I shouldn't give you what you want. Because once I do, there won't be any going back." I wrap one arm around her back, hauling her body closer so I can nuzzle the valley between her tits, hoping it will take a little of the edge off my need. "So if you just want to do this with me because it will make you feel like you finally left it all behind you, I'm not the man for the job."
I’m not here for a quick fuck with her. That’s not what I want from Lydia. I want it all. Everything she has to give. And I want to offer her the same in return.
Lydia brings her hand to my head, fingers tangling in my hair as she continues to grind against me. "What does that mean, there's no going back?"
Lydia's not running from the room, which encourages me. Gives me hope I will finally have everything I’ve wanted. I’ve watched, envious, as so many of my brothers fell, dropping one by one into a happiness I’ve never had.
Now I know how fucking insane they went trying to get it.
"It means from then on you sleep in my bed, with me, every night." I slide my hand between her thighs, finding the hard nub of her clit and rubbing it gently. "It means when you ache you come to me so I can give you what you need."
Lydia’s head falls forward on a gasp. “If you’re trying to deter me you’re not doing a very good job.”
Is that what I’m trying to do? I’m not so sure it is anymore.
I pull my hand from her pussy, gritting my teeth at the soft sound of protest she makes. I hold the condom up between us. “Then decide what you want.”
I expect her to think it over. To weigh the options in front of her.
That’s not what happens.
Lydia snags the packet from my hand and tears it open, sliding the rubber free as she leans back. Then her hands are on me, urgent and determined. But, unsurprisingly, her skills at putting a condom on are lacking. She makes a frustrated sound as she fights to get it in place.
I swipe her hands away, fisting the protection into place.
She gives me a sweet little smile. “Thank you.”
“Don’t thank me yet.” I grip her hips, sinking my fingers into the softness there as I pull her back over me, notching the head of my dick against her before sliding my thumb against her clit as I nose along the swell of one tit, working my way toward a nipple. “Your turn, Sweetheart. Do your worst.”
21
LYDIA
PART OF ME can't believe I'm here.
Part of me can't believe it took me so long.
Physical intimacy was one of the things that intrigued me most when I finally found myself in the real world. I expected it would be something I would jump into with both feet but, like cutting my hair, that isn't how it worked out. And right now, I’m glad.
Because I can't imagine doing this with anyone else but Christian. Not just because of how he looks, though that is definitely a perk. It's his hesitancy that lets me know this is exactly what I want to do and exactly who I want to do it with.
He’s still worried about what's best for me, and after spending the majority of my life surrounded by men who only worried about what was best for them, I'm starting to get a little addicted to being the one put first. So addicted, I've managed to not only sneak a condom from Piper's purse but also muster up the courage to come all the way back down here and use it.
Or at least I plan to use it. I'm currently adjusting to the sensation of something so thick pressing up against a part of me that suddenly feels very small.
"Relax." Christian’s mouth latches on to my nipple, the pull of his lips shooting a wickedly sinful sensation straight between my thighs to amplify the ache there.
It's an ache I'm very familiar with, but tonight I'm noticing an aspect of it I haven't before. An emptiness. I feel almost hollow. It's strange and surprisingly unexpected given all I know about the mechanics of this particular act. Obviously I knew penetration must feel good, but I didn't expect to crave it like this.
Toneedit.
Christian’s mouth draws at me again, but this time his tongue flicks against my nipple, adding another level of sensation. It feels unbearably good and compounds everything happening between my legs.
Without meaning to, I bear down against him, seeking relief. I inhale sharply as his body stretches mine, caught between an odd combination of discomfort and relief.
And I want more.
I blow out the breath I've been holding, forcing my muscles to stop contracting, and press down again, working more of him into me.
