Page 116 of Next to Everything We Wanted
I frowned. “It doesn’t have to be this way.”
“But it is, Gavin. I wanted to be with you forever. Yet within a few weeks, you were already on to the next girl—and look how that turned out. Because no matter what happens, you never change.”
“What do you mean I never change?” I snapped. “I tried to mend things between us, Celeste. I knew this breakup would hurt you—which is why I put it off for so long—but you’ve turned from my best friend to a bitter ex. I’ve been gentle with your feelings, but you haven’t cared about mine. You treat me like I’m an asshole.”
Her eyes widened. “I’m not trying to!”
“You are, though. You’ve been holding this breakup against me while I just wanted to move on. Not because I don’t care, but because that’s what you do when things don’t work out.” I crossed my arms, my heart hammering underneath them. “If this is how things will go down, then we can’t be friends.”
“I just want to know what I did wrong! What did Sienna do right that I screwed up?”
“Forget about Sienna. The same goes with her—we’re over. I’ll move on.” I didn’t believe those words one bit, though if I kept telling myself that, maybe my heart would follow along. “If this were with any other girl, you’d still feel the same way.”
“You’re right!” She threw her hands up, her towel slipping down her waist. “I’m tired of being a good sport when my heart is breaking, Gavin. Because ofyou.” Her eyes locked with mine again as a tear trickled down her cheek. “I’ve tried so hard to mask how much this has been affecting me, to be a good best friend, but I can’t do it anymore. I can’t be strong.”
I sighed, wiping the tear away. It felt like there was nothing I could do to fix this. To take our pain away, to have us be best friends again.
Could exes really be friends?
“Remember when we fought a month ago because I was bubbling up my feelings?” I asked, my hand still on her cheek. “Because I wasn’t communicating when you wanted to talk things through?”
She nodded as another tear fell.
“It’s reversed now. You’ve been bubbling everything inside.”
“I didn’t want to be selfish. You were with Sienna, and it’d makemethe asshole if I always talked about our breakup while you were trying to enjoy yourself.”
I sat on a bar stool and patted the seat next to mine. “Then stop masking everything and let it all out.”
She raised an eyebrow. “Are you sure? It won’t upset you?”
“The only thing that upsets me is that you’re upset.”
She drew in a breath before sitting next to me. “I want things to go back to the way they were last year. When our relationship was amazing, when we loved our new lives as Somewhere in the Sky, when . . . we thought we’d gotten next to everything we wanted.” She wiped her nose with her arm. “I just want something solid.”
“I’m sorry, Celeste. I’m sorry you’ve been through this alone. Trust me, I wish everything hadn’t changed either. Last year was the best year of my life.”
“Everything was perfect.” She squeezed my hand, her own trembling “And I thought you were perfect for me.”
“You still are perfect. For someone else. You’re going to meet an amazing guy one day who will sweep you off your feet. And if you ever need to take a break from the band—from me—let me know. I don’t want you hurting like this.”
“I don’t want to leave the band over this. I can’t ruin our friendship.” She threaded a hand through her wet hair. “So much has been piling on me. This breakup, our band issues, figuring out what to do with my apartment since my roommate can’t pay the rent alone, the list just goes on.”
“Wait, what’s happening with your roommate?” Celeste lived a few complexes away from ours. She’d moved out of her parents’ house a few months before she turned eighteen to live there. “Are you moving out?”
“Oh, crap.” She rubbed her temple. “I didn’t tell you guys. I want to move back in with my parents to help my mom.”
My stomach clenched. “What happened?”
She let out a heavy sigh. “My dad’s pancreatic cancer came back. He’s . . .” A tear fell from her cheek, and she wiped it away. “He’s not going to make it to next year.”
“What?” Tears burned in the back of my eyes as I thought of Mr. Villa’s smiling face. He was the sweetest man I’d ever met.“Celeste, I’m so sorry. I had no idea you were going through this the entire time.”
“I guess I forgot to bring it up.” She fiddled with her bikini strap. “I want to help my mom take care of him before he passes.”
Before he passes. That sounded so wrong. There was no way Celeste’s dad could die before the end of the year. He’d been doing so well after he’d beaten cancer the first time. “I-I don’t know what to say. I’m devastated for you.”
Celeste sighed. “Thank you. I’ll get over everything else soon to focus on that.”
