Page 53 of Next to Everything We Wanted
She nodded over to my plate. “You didn’t finish your cookies.”
“I can save them for later.”
Phoenix whispered something to Forrest and Ellis, and the three of them got up from the floor.
“We’re going out on the balcony to watch the sunset,” Ellis said, scratching the back of his neck. “We’ll be back in a few minutes.”
I rolled my eyes. “Yeah, the sunset must be so interesting today.”
He only gave me a small smile before following Forrest and Phoenix, who whispered to each other, out onto the balcony.
A few moments later, my phone buzzed with a text.
Phoenix
Talk to her
And I mean TALK
For real
I sighed, turning my phone over so I wouldn’t see the screen. “Is everything okay?” I asked Celeste softly as she sat next to me.
Her face darkened as her thick brows furrowed. “Do you really think that it is? What’s your problem?”
Her harsh tone cut into my chest. “I don’t have a freaking problem,” I snapped. “What’syour problem?”
“My problem is that you used to not be like this. You were always reserved and anxious. Now you’re just uptight. Even more than Forrest.”
More uptight than Forrest? Now,thathurt. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” But I did. As much as I wishedshe was wrong, I knew that I’d been uptight since our breakup and that evening with Sienna. I thought Asher had been overdramatic, but maybe he’d been right. Did I want to admit that? Never.
Celeste crossed her arms. “Stop lying to me.”
I sighed, running a hand through my hair. “Listen, I don’t know what’s causing me to act this way.”
“You’re still lying.”
“Fine.” I looked away from her, not able to handle the intensity of her gaze as the realization dawned on me—I hadn’t let myself heal from our breakup. I’d expected the discomfort, but I thought that after a week max, we’d be over it. Back to being friends. Used to no longer kissing whenever we saw each other, no longer brushing hands at the table, no longer discussing our future together. “I haven’t been . . . processing things.”
“What things?” Her voice broke. “The fact that you can’t even look at me anymore?”
I finally faced her again to notice how in pain she looked. Her eyes were red and glistening as her lip trembled. “I can look at you,” I said, staring into her deep, teary eyes. “I see you.”
Her leg brushed against mine. “You don’t know how to be around me anymore,” she said, a tear trailing down her cheek. “Was it something I did? Did I pressure you?”
“Celeste.” My mind went back to the moments when I’d comforted her. She’d lean her head on my shoulder, and I’d wrap my arm around her waist. She’d look up at me with those beautiful golden-brown eyes, and my heart would beat out of my chest as I leaned in for a kiss.
Now, those memories just made my chest hollow and my stomach sour.
“You didn’t do anything wrong,” I finally said, my voice soft. “We’d just run our course.”
“Run our course?” She said the words as if they were a slur. “Like a track meet?”
My frustration smoldered. “Why are you acting like this?”
“Why are you acting surprised? You know you’re the only person I’ve loved like this. We used to understand each other. And now . . . we’restrangers. Instead of communicating with me, you’re distracting yourself with some highschooler.”
I coughed into my sleeve. “What are you talking about? That couldn’t be farther from the truth.”
