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It was terrifying, yet so freaking thrilling.

“Hey, Ivan, wait!”

I whipped around to see Sienna closing the door behind her. She scurried over to me, her purse strapped over her shoulder.

“I thought you were eager to get that fancy bra off,” I said before cringing at my joke. My charms had clearly disappeared for the night.

She giggled as she opened her purse. “It’s a bralette. And I’ve broken it in now.” She pulled out a disk and handed it to me. “Here’s a CD I made with some of the songs we’ve heard together. I know making a playlist is more convenient, but this is special. Personal.”

My lungs tightened in my chest. At that moment, the truth almost fell from my lips. I opened my mouth to speak but closed it again. Yeah, right. If I told her about my past, she’d slam that door and never come out to see me again. She’d be furious at me for lying to her for all these weeks, leading her to think I was just some regular guy. She’d look me up and be baffled from all those articles about my stupid behavior.

Or maybe she’d understand and still like me the way I was.

“Thank you.” My hands shook as I put the CD in my bag. “This is my new favorite in my collection.”

“Have a great night.” Sienna hugged me before standing back and giving me another smile, though this one had a sad undertone.

“You too.” I pressed a kiss to her lips before walking away.

I looked back as she watched me hop into my car, my heart aching with every movement. She really was mine. We were together. Still, a heavy feeling sat in the pit of my stomach, following me home.

I unlocked my apartment door and walked down the short hall. My male bandmates, who were rewatching the 2012 Olympics while eating ice cream, snapped their heads toward me.

“About time you finally returned,” Ellis said with a beam, his hair falling into his eyes. “Forrest peed and snacked more than a pregnant woman while we were waiting.”

“What’s your problem with pregnant women?” Forrest muttered, crossing his arms with a glare. “Your mom used to be one, you know.”

“Dang, I thought a doctor delivered me.”

I rolled my eyes. “Are you guys incapable of chilling when I’m not around?”

“Yes,” Phoenix said. “Fully incapable.”

I laughed before a sinking feeling coursed through me. “Where’s Celeste?”

“She never came over,” Phoenix said as he ate his ice cream. “I think she visited her parents today.”

Guilt weighed on my chest, though I pushed it down. Her visiting her parents had nothing to do with my date. And even if it did, she had every right to not want to be here. If Sienna had moved on so quickly from me, I’d struggle being supportive of her dating someone too.

“Is her dad doing alright?” I asked. Mr. Villa had beaten pancreatic cancer, but Celeste had told us that there was a risk of it returning.

Ellis frowned. “We’re not sure. She hasn’t been saying much about him.”

“I hope we get good news soon.” I sat between Phoenix and Forrest. “While you guys were worrying, I had the best date of my life with Sienna.”

Forrest’s eyebrows raised. “So, nothing went wrong?”

I shook my head.

“So, he can stop stressing out?” Ellis said.

“Like you and Phoenix weren’t stressed,” Forrest muttered. “I saw you bite your manicured nails.”

“I have a nail appointment next week,” Ellis said, waving a hand covered in chipped blue nail polish.

“You were stressed, too?” I asked Phoenix.

Phoenix scratched the back of his neck. “Forrest’s energy was rubbing off on me.”