Page 10 of Witch's Rebirth
I circled my fingertips absentmindedly on her knee. "No, not really. You just learn to not think about it."
"I was afraid you'd say that," she murmured.
Another few moments of silence passed between us, both of us working through our thoughts. Truthfully, I hadn't ever thought about death in any true humanizing, philosophical sense. I let the animal side take over when the time came to spill blood. For the first time, I wondered why that was. Would I feel too much for my victims if I really thought about it? Would the human side of me really be able to face that not only had I killed thousands, but enjoyed it? The answer came to me easily.
"Killing is such a terrible, consuming thing and yet it's as normal as laughing at something funny. Or becoming aroused when you see your partner naked."
Deja lifted an eyebrow, studying me with those beautiful golden irises. "I'm not sure I'm following."
I rubbed my jaw. Fuck, I needed to shave. And I was nowhere near as good at talking about this stuff as Ash. I lived to cause pain and give my woman pleasure, not think about the causes, effects, and meanings of those things.
"It's... the one constant paradox, I guess is what I'm trying to say," I sighed. "Even if we think we live outside of it, death comes for all of us. Everyone knows it’s inevitable and yet we fear it coming upon us or inflicting it to someone else."
"But we know something humans don't." Deja sipped her tea pensively. "We know death isn't the end of life."
"In the strict sense, yes," I agreed. "Still, I'm sure we all felt our hearts stop when old birdbrain fell out of the sky. There's a reason for that."
She looked over at Raum, still sleeping like a baby. With a cleaner face and a more feminine figure, he could have passed for Sleeping Beauty.
"It's selfish, really," Deja said softly. "I panicked and ran out there because I didn't want to lose him. I didn't want to go through this lifetime without seeing him smile at me again. I couldn't stand to go without feeling his hands on me. I love him, but in those moments all I really thought about was myself."
Saying nothing, I pulled her into my lap until she sat in the space between my legs with her head on my chest.
"There's nothing wrong with thinking of yourself, beautiful." I rubbed her arms as we both watched Raum sleep. "That's what we did when we lost you. We commiserated in being without you. In some weird way, it got us through all those long centuries."
She looked up at me with a smile that made my heart skip a beat.
"You're much wiser than you give yourself credit for, my lion."
Everything I ever felt for this woman seemed to crash over me like an ocean wave in that one single moment. The wordsI love youdidn't scratch the surface of what ran through me while she looked at me like that. Ash and Raum had their ways with words, not me. So I just kissed her. Hard.
She kissed me back just as fiercely, greedily, her small hands clawing at my neck and shoulders. I pulled her tightly against my chest, needing her just as much as she needed me.
We slid off Raum's bed together, moving to the doorway to find privacy in another bedroom, when a sound of throat clearing made us stop in our tracks.
Fucking Seth.
He looked on with a blank expression, leaning casually in the doorway as my fist curled at my side. Punching him in the face seemed like a grand idea in that moment.
"Did you need something?" Deja asked, not-so-subtly running a hand across the front of my jeans.
"I'm not exactly sure how to phrase this." The fucker took his sweet time, rubbing his jaw and rolling his eyes skyward as Deja and I gave him death stares.
"Just say it, Seth," Deja snapped.
"Okay, fine." He had the balls to grin. "There's a fox and a wolf at the door for you."
5
DEJA
Istomped down the stairs, thoroughly pissed at Seth for interrupting some much-needed intimacy between me and Sal. Even worse? I couldn't scrub the thought of both of them in bed with me out of my mind. The image popped into my head so suddenly I almost wondered if Seth planted it there himself with his super-shadow abilities.
But I knew he wouldn't. Despite being such an asshole, he seemed to have a pretty strict moral code regarding the privacy of people's subconscious. I had to respect him for that, at least.
Just like he said, I opened the front door to find a beautiful silver wolf and a blue-eyed vixen sitting like obedient pets on my front porch. My anger subsided at seeing my friends, but unfortunately my visions of threesomes did not.
"Astrid, Orion!" I greeted them, swinging the door wide open. "Come in, you guys."
