Page 28 of Witch's Rebirth
Bright, lovely Nona, the guiding light in our Deja's lifetime looked up at me. Her tear-filled eyes, still hanging onto hope and optimism, flooded over when she saw me. She didn't have to ask. Her eyes squeezed shut as she choked out a sob and I knew that bright light was snuffed out.
Not knowing what else to do, I pulled her into a hug. She sobbed openly into my chest, my attempts to shush and soothe her drowned out by her grief. I looked down at my hands wrapped around her and saw my own fingers shaking. The sinking feeling in my chest turned into a cement block in my stomach. The shock and denial was wearing off and reality began sinking in.
I cleared my throat but couldn't get rid of the feeling that it was closing up.
"You need to get some rest," I murmured to her. "None of us are in top shape right now. We can keep looking once you've slept a little and eaten something."
Nona gave a shaky nod and slowly looked up at me with puffy, red eyes.
"Can I come to the house with you guys?" she asked. "I want to be around her magic, her presence. I don't know how to explain it but I..."
"Of course." I knew exactly what she was talking about. We all wanted the comfort and familiarity of Deja's magic, which was present in everything she touched. To normal humans, it was like wearing your lover's clothing or using their pillow because their scent was comforting. We all just wanted to feel Deja there. None of us were ready to let go.
The rest of the shifters returned to their camp. Ash and I decided to anchor home with Nona in tow. Sal volunteered to drive the truck back. Normally, I would agree on the account that his temper was so volatile, he wanted to be alone where he had no risk of hurting anyone. But if anyone seemed volatile right then, it was Ash. Sal for the most part had been quiet and sullen.
I turned to Seth, still standing like a mannequin with his thousand-yard stare. "You coming, dude?"
"No, I don't think so." He shook his head and rubbed his eyes. "Someone should probably stay out here in case... I dunno. Just in case."
"You're still a damn human, man." I felt like I was chastising a child. "You need sleep and food. If anyone should stay out here, it should be one of us." I gestured to Ash, Sal and myself. "But going crazy in the woods isn't gonna help anyone. We're gonna recuperate and come right back."
"Nah," he shook his head again. "You guys go on. I'll take a break when you guys get back but I'm gonna stay."
I shrugged. "Suit yourself." We all dealt with grief in our own ways. If his was to become prey to wild animals, so be it.
Seconds later, I appeared with Nona and Ash in our kitchen. It felt wrong. Quiet and too empty.
The recycling bin was still filled with beer bottles from when Nona and Deja pulled their all-nighter. I didn't even want to look at the counter where Sal and I took turns with her that amazing day that felt so long ago.
"Take the master bedroom," I told Nona, gently guiding her to the stairs. "There's fresh sheets in the linen closet just outside. The bathroom should have everything you need if you want to shower."
"Thanks, Raum." She forced a smile at me and gave a gentle squeeze of my hand before taking the steps and disappearing out of view.
The moment Ash and I were alone, all hell broke loose.
He grabbed the first thing he could find, Deja's tea cup, and sent it flying across the room. It shattered against the far wall, turning into dust and leaving a serious dent thanks to his demon strength.
I threw up shields in front of the windows and sliding glass doors and just stood silently while he unleashed his pain, his control.
He threw every cup and glass we had in the cupboards, then he started on the dining chairs and the kitchen table, all of which became piles of splinters upon impact. Thankfully, Nona knew better than to come back downstairs.
Ash wasn't crying, grunting or screaming, but I could see the pain etched on his face. I'd never seen him act this way before in my life, not even when she was taken from us the first time. Because we knew then she'd eventually come back. But now?
None of us knew what to do, or how tobewithout her. There was no point to us existing without her. We all knew that and didn't know how to deal with it.
After several minutes of destroying everything in his path, Ash seemed to have worn himself out. He sank to the floor, breathing heavily and not caring about the debris littered everywhere. The entire downstairs looked like a war zone.
"What the fuck do we do, Raum?" He said my name but asked the question like he expected Lucifer, the angels, or anyone else listening to answer him. "For the first time ever, I'm completely at a fucking loss." His voice was pained, raw with emotion.
"Well, we can't sit down and think about it over coffee," I mused, looking around the room. Even with magic, this would be a fucking bitch to clean up.
Ash was on me instantly, getting in my face and shoving me back forcefully.
"You think now's a really good time for your fucking jokes, Raum?" he snarled. His aura grew to twice the size of his body, crackling and swirling with everything he was feeling. I did my best to remain calm, knowing he could eliminate me if pushed too far.
"No, I don't," I answered. "I especially don't think it's a good time to be at each other's throats, either."
He looked at me as if he was seriously considering killing me, then looked around for something to destroy. Unfortunately, he already fucked the whole place up.
