Page 31 of Smoke and Mirrors
We said our goodbyes, then Mel and I piled into my truck. This time she didn’t hesitate at all about sitting close to me. I kept my arm around her shoulder as I steered the truck back through the winding forest roads with one hand.
“Penny for your thoughts?” I quipped after we drove several minutes in dead silence.
“I feel guilty,” she said after a moment of pondering. “Like I betrayed him.”
“Why?”
“He wanted nothing to do with hospitals. I’m certain he didn’t want me telling anyone about his PTSD or his leg pain either. They’re going to treat him which is great, but he was right. Someone’s got to pay for it and we might end up homeless because of this.”
“Homeless is better than dead,” I answered. “You did the right thing and so did Nigel.”
“He’s going to be so pissed at me, though,” she sighed. “I mean, I’m glad he’ll be alive to be pissed but I just know it’s going to be a fight. He’d rather be some kind of martyr than seek every possible treatment available.”
“I’ll back you up,” I promised, stroking my thumb on her arm. “So will Hunter. He’s allowed to be pissed about whatever but we won’t let him take it out on you. You did this because you love him. If he can’t see that for what it is, he’s a fucking idiot.”
“Thank you, Raz,” she whispered, snuggling into my shoulder.
I dropped a kiss on her forehead as we drove on in comfortable silence, but something gnawed at me. Was I shooting myself in the foot here? I was being emotional support for her right now, which I was happy to do, but what about when Connor got better? Would she still need me like this? Or would she go back to hating my existence?
We pulled up to Connor’s trailer and I waited in the truck while she showered and changed her clothes. Then it was a short drive back to my campsite, where we could finally wind down and relax.
Most of my men were already breaking down tents and packing up belongings. We only gathered as a group for Nigel’s carnival. Unlike me, they were humans with lives and jobs outside of the carnival world. I gave them a quick rundown of what was happening and wished them well. By morning, only my stuff would still be here.
“I didn’t think I’d have company over,” I said sheepishly as I led Mel into my main tent, quickly putting away my collection of knives and tidying the place up. She stood in the middle of my antique rug, a Persian relic I stole, looking uncomfortable and kept glancing at my bed.
“Raz?” she asked in a small voice.
“Yes,steluta?” I approached her, fighting the urge to pull her into my arms again.
“Have you been with anyone else?” her eyes flickered from me to the bed nervously. “Since Ally?”
I almost laughed. My little star was just as jealous as my dragon.
“No,” I answered, taking hold of her hands. “I’ve been… waiting for you to feel ready to talk to me.” A grin escaped me. “Without yelling or throwing insults.”
“I’m sorry, Raz.” Her eyes glittered with tears. “You were right. I was just being stupid and stubborn. I didn’t want to admit I was wrong.”
“I’m sorry, too.” She pressed her face to my chest and I stroked her hair. “You were also right. I led her on and that was wrong of me, whether she was a crazy bitch or not. I don’t want to be a man that…” I exhaled deeply. “That breaks hearts.”
Her head lifted slowly as she peered up at me, and I wiped the tears that just began to escape her gorgeous dark eyes.
“Do you regret kissing me?”
My hand trailed down her cheek to cup the side of her face.
“Do you want the truth?”
“Always.”
“Not for a second,” I answered, my breath hitching. “Maybe the circumstances, yes. But I’ll never regret kissing you if it’s the last one I taste.”
Her chin tilted up, lips parted. I lowered my forehead until it grazed against hers. Our noses touched and I just felt her soft breath fan against my mouth before my own mouth opened.
“Miss Melody! Mister Razvan!”
A child yelled for us right outside our tent just our lips touched and we jerked away from each other, already breathless and panting.
“Hey Roo,” Mel laughed nervously at the boy who poked his head into the tent. “You found us.”
