Page 39 of Fearless
I ignored the dissenting voice in my head as I marched up to Jandro’s house. I promised I wouldn’tpushShadow, but I had to help in some way. If there were more baby steps between a cordial conversation in my office and this, I would take them. But some progress had to be made and I knew for certain Shadow would not step out of his comfort zone. Not without someone there to guide him.
I’ve slept with him and I have to talk myself up to having a conversation with him. How backward is that?
My throat closed up with nervousness. I hadn't talked about it again since that night with Reaper, and neither did the guys. No one treated it like an elephant in the room, but I thought about it more than I liked to admit. Shadow was attractive. Sexy even. Maybe not in a conventional way, but surely I couldn’t be the only woman who thought that?
I didn’t know if I was fixated on helping because of what happened between us, or just that I tried to fix everything in general. Shadow deserved healing more than anyone, not to mention a peaceful night of sleep. I couldn’t help being female, but I could only hope that he was getting comfortable with me enough to not hold my gender against me.
I raised my fist and knocked softly at the front door. When no answer came after about thirty seconds, I turned the knob and pushed it open.
No one in Sheol locked their front doors, I noticed early on. It was the ultimate safe neighborhood.
“Hello?” I called, stepping inside cautiously.
Just then I realized Jandro didn’t give me much of a house tour last night. We’d been so starry-eyed for each other and he pretty much led me straight into the kitchen.
In the daylight, I noticed all the smaller details and personal touches I missed last time. I didn’t realize it last night, but Jandro and Shadow's sides of the house were like a night and day difference.
Jandro's side was brighter, both from the open windows letting light pour in and the metallic bike parts set out on his work table. He kept tools of every sort organized in a case nearby, several five-gallon buckets stacked within each other, and neatly folded rags next to degreasers and other cleaning products.
It was an organized clutter, one that showed care and respect for every piece and component of his work. Jandro was a man who brought work home with him, not out of obligation but because motorcycles were his passion.
Shadow's side on the other hand, was the complete opposite.
Blackout curtains over the windows didn't allow a crack of light to slip through. His area was dark and completely devoid of clutter. Compared to Jandro's side, the lack of any personal touch almost seemed sterile.
Only a desk lamp gave any touch of warmth to the dark living space. The bulb illuminated an open sketchbook on the desk. It must have been the same one he’d been drawing last night. Curiosity got the better of me, and I leaned over to take a look.
The page was open to a highly detailed pencil drawing of some kind of cactus flower. A circle of long, sharp spines grew out from behind the base of the slender, white petals and surrounded the flower like a crown. The actual cactus plant looked to be some kind of vine species, spreading out in long elegant tendrils across the page. I'd never seen anything like it. The squat, round cacti around here didn't even compare.
I skimmed my fingers over the page, convinced the flower would jump to life had it been colored in. Did Shadow really draw this?
Pulling myself away before I started flipping through pages, I headed toward the back of the quiet house. Jandro's chickens pecked at the ground just on the other side of the sliding glass door leading to the backyard. I paused to watch them with a smile, never realizing before what cute and funny birds they were. Movement at the corner of my eye caused me to turn, and I nearly had to pick my jaw up from the floor.
A shirtless Shadow was doing pull-ups on a horizontal bar. His back was to me and unsurprisingly, more scars covered the wide wall of muscle. Overlapping and reaching every corner of his body, whoever gave him those didn't want to leave any piece of skin without the touch of pain.
But his muscles moving underneath the skin were a sight to behold. He pulled himself up and lowered himself down with such control and precision, making it look effortless. It took me a moment to realize he held a large weight between his legs.
I knew he was big, muscular, and a skilled fighter. But it only hit me in that moment how utterly fuckingstronghe was.
Chill out, Mari. Be cool. You and Shadow are friendly now, like two peas in a pod. Okay, bad example. But seriously, be cool!
I pushed the sliding door open just as Shadow released the pull-up bar.
"Hey," I greeted when he glanced over his shoulder.
I'd never seen a man move so fast until just then. He pulled on his shirt in the same time it took for me to blink. In another fraction of a second, he loosened his hair which had been tied back. With his back still turned to me, he seemed to rake his hair forward to cover his face.
"Mariposa!" he barked, panting slightly when he finally whirled around to face me.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt your workout," I stammered out, my pulse elevating slightly at how he scowled at me.
But his gaze softened after I spoke. "It's okay. I just wasn't expecting anyone." He looked down and rubbed at the tape wrapped around his hands. "Jandro's not here. He's probably at the shop."
I swallowed.Be cool. "I actually stopped by to see you."
"Me?" His dark eye widened, brow lifting. "Why?"
I pulled the orange bottle from my pocket and held it at my side. "If you don't want this, just tell me and I won't bother you with it again."
