Page 7 of Merciless
“Everything.” He was looking at me with both eyes again. “You were there when we first formed the club, and I never took you seriously as a brother. I used your assassin skills, and your art for all of our tattoos. But when you needed friendship and guidance, I just let Jandro deal with you. I should have respected you more from the beginning, and I’m sorry that I didn’t.”
“Reaper, it’s—“
“And with Mari.” He faced forward again, closing his eyes. “I handled that so wrong. I fucked it up so bad.”
“It’s really okay, Reaper,” I insisted. “That whole time away was actually something I needed badly. And it all worked out in the end.” My eyes shifted around our cell. “Current circumstances not included.”
He laughed bitterly. “No, I get it now. I deserve to be in here.”
“No, you don’t.” I pulled at my restraints, wishing I could go to his side. “No one deserves a life of torture, Reaper. I wouldn’t even wish it on the people who did it to me.”
“Well, you’re a better man than me.”
“That’s not for me to judge.”
“Who, then?” he scoffed. “The gods?”
A thought occurred to me with that last question. “Have you tried your ability from Hades since we ended up here?”
“Yeah, there’s nothing.”
My eyes narrowed. “What do you mean?”
“There’s nothing for me to see through, no death.”
“We killed lots of Tash soldiers back at Four Corners. You can’t see through any of them to assess the situation over there?”
“No. I’ve tried and they’re…not empty vessels. It’s not life, but there is somethinginthem. Something holding on that won’t let go.”
I sat back against my wall, even more confused. “But you saw through the ones on the battlefield.”
“Those weren’t fully zombified, I don’t think. Not under complete control like the black swarm that came for us.”
“Why should that matter?” I wondered aloud.
“I don’t know, Shadow. All I know is that it feels like I’m trying to crawl into a slab of solid concrete like it’s a sleeping bag. It’s just not happening.”
“What about Hades?” I pressed. “Has he told you anything?”
“If he did, you’d be the first to know,” Reaper said bitterly. “I’m sure you know by now these gods only intervene when it suits them.”
Well, fuck.
Worse than the torture, than being separated from Mari and everyone else, was not knowing anything that was happening outside these four walls. Was Mari safe, alive? Was there still a home for us to return to? If I wasn’t so exhausted from all the beatings and lack of food, it would keep me awake.
I scooted my legs to the side to lie down as comfortably as I could with a bunch of chains and restraints attaching me to the wall.
“In case it wasn’t already clear, Reaper…” I started to drift off right away, my head resting on my hands.
“Hm?”
“I forgive you. For everything.”
Neither of us said anything after that, but I was certain we both felt it—the finality of what the other man said. We were unburdening ourselves, making peace.
Just in case neither one of us made it out alive.
Three
