Page 27 of Faithless
Rori blinked those forest green eyes and eased back slowly, her fingers dragging a few inches down my legs before her hands returned to her lap.
“You deserved better than what your parents did to you, Torr. I don’t know if I, Daren, or my parents ever told you that, but it’s true.”
I shrugged again. “The point I’m trying to make is that you can’t run through scenarios in your head, trying to predict an outcome, because it’ll never turn out the way you think it might. You’ll just get yourself worked up for no reason.”
“My dad Gunner would disagree,” she argued.
“He made predictions as a tactician with the knowledge he had available to him. His battle strategies were based on his expertise in the field, not wild guesses. Your predictions are based on your anxiety.”
“Well, shit. Ouch.”
“All I’m saying is, it’s better to hear what the facts are and then plan accordingly.”
Rori sighed before she snatched the pillow back from me. I saw it coming, but I let her take it anyway. “You’re right,” she sighed, hugging the pillow to her chest again. “I know you’re right. I just…can’t turn my brain off.”
“I know.” I leaned forward and tickled the bottom of her foot, something I always did to distract her from an anxious meltdown when we were kids. “I’m here for that too.”
“Stop!” She laughed, flinging her foot out and narrowly missing kicking me in the chin. With all the times she had kicked me when I tickled her, I was surprised I still had all my teeth.
“Try to sleep,” I told her. “And when your mind starts racing, imagine kicking me in the face. I’m sure those thoughts will be a lot more satisfying.”
She scoffed, tossing the pillow back up to the headboard. “Thanks, Torr.”
Rori scooted across the bed to her side and reached for the lamp on the nightstand. I stripped down to my boxers and climbed in, careful to stay close to my edge so I wouldn’t accidentally touch her. Once I pulled the sheets up to my chest, Rori clicked off the light, and the room plunged into darkness.
“Goodnight,” I heard her whisper softly from across the bed.
“Night, Ror.”
I adjusted my pillow, settled in, and waited, listening for when her gentle breathing deepened so I could move to the floor.
10
RORI
Iwoke up exhausted, feeling like I needed another eight hours just to feel normal. I had fallen asleep faster than expected, probably because we’d ridden all day and it was my first long ride in several months. My body’s weariness made up for the fact that my mind ran like a hamster wheel.
Groaning, I rubbed the sand from my eyes. Why did my body feel so heavy? Oh wait, there was an arm thrown over my waist.
Torr’s arm.
I noticed the dark lines of his tattoos first, the half-sleeve of swirling gray smoke that solidified into a snow-capped mountain on the top of his shoulder. His forearm was a golden tan from the sun, visible veins and corded muscles stretching down to a strong hand with long fingers.
My breath paused in my chest, and I laid there for a few seconds, frozen. I became aware of his deep, even breathing directly behind my head. Not snoring, thankfully. His chest wasn’t quite pressed against my back, but I could sense the solidness and heat of him all the same.
Unfortunately, I needed air to live, so I started breathing again, forcing the inhales to be as slow as possible so as to not disturb him. So I could make this last a little longer, before he realized what he’d done.
Or hadIinstigated this? A quick look told me no, I was still on my side. Torr had been the one to cross the invisible boundary in our bed, and it secretly thrilled me.
He slept on, breathing deep and steady, so I began turning over as slowly and quietly as humanly possible. The sight of his sleeping face nearly made me gasp. He wassobeautiful. Did he always have those freckles? I’d never noticed them before. But of course, I’d never woken up in bed next to him either.
Tons of women must have gotten this view and woken up the same way I did. But I couldn’t bring myself to be jealous right then. He was here with me, not with any of them.
The thought brought a cold dose of reality, like icy water to the face. He wasn’twithme, not really. He hadn’t even wanted to sleep in the same bed. If I hadn’t insisted on it, he would probably be on the floor now.
I wanted to touch him and curled my hand into a fist just so I wouldn’t be tempted. He wouldn’t welcome that, not from me. The only reason he came on this ride with me was because there was no one else. Lily needed Daren more than I did. My parents weren’t fighters in their prime anymore. Torr put aside his own wants and was being an incredible friend by doing this. I had to be grateful for that and not hope for anything more. To do so was selfish.
Torr pulled in a deep breath and stirred, rolling to his back with a soft groan. That arm lifted away from me as he rubbed his eyes.
