Page 70 of Deathless
Shadow sighed heavily, but his eyes brightened and a smile played at his lips. “How did you become so wise?”
“Being possessed by a deity manifested out of hatred has a way of putting things into perspective.”
He chuckled again, picking up his machine. “So you want your tattoo or not, President?”
“Yes, sir.” I swung my legs to extend them along the length of the table again and reclined back into position.
“Don’t underestimate them,” he said as he resumed tracing a line. “Especially not now, so close to the end. They didn’t have their goddess back in my day.”
He didn’t need to worry about that. Having the Dark Mother inside me had taught me more than I ever expected.
24
DEVIN
“Ikissed her.”
Hudson’s expression didn’t change. I almost thought he hadn’t heard me. He sat on the porch railing, holding a beer on his knee as he watched some of the guys play a drunken touch football game in the driveway. Half of the shirtless team were proudly sporting their freshly outlined Vengeful Gods tattoos on their chests, stomachs, or backs.
At some point, I’d get mine as well.
I wasn’t sure exactly when my loyalty to Rori became ironclad. Maybe it had always been there, an invisible motive hidden beneath my frustration at being attracted to her. Something that only came to the surface when I realized we could lose her, and then in the soul-shaking relief when she came back.
All of that was stuff I had to work through. But I also owed loyalty and honesty to Hudson.
If I were to gain something with her, I didn’t want to lose him. It would kill me to do so. He felt a certain way toward Rori as well, and while it felt like a pipe dream for all five of us,Torr and Santos included, to end up a happy family, I remained clinging to that hope.
“Did you feel something?”
“Hm?” Hudson had finally spoken and pulled me out of my swirling mess of thoughts.
“Did you feel something when you kissed her?” he repeated.
“Yes,” I admitted with a resigned nod.
“Similar to what you feel for me?”
“Similar but different.” I yearned to touch him, to comfort and reassure him, but his posture was stiff and I knew he wouldn’t be responsive. “It doesn’t diminish what I feel for you at all. You’re two different people, so what I feel is just...different for each of you.”
I wanted to apologize for what I’d done, but it would be a lame attempt at absolving myself of responsibility and a lie on top of that. Hudson deserved better.
“I’m sorry for hurting you,” I decided on instead. I was still an asshole, but at least that sorrow was genuine. “I never intended to go behind your back. I only wanted you to feel good.”
“Jesus, stop.”
I froze, taken aback as Hudson took a long pull of beer.
“We just decided to fool around. It’s not like we got married. I never expected you to never want or touch someone else.”
It took a moment for those words to sink in. “Oh.”
“Honestly, I saw you falling for her from a mile away.” He passed the beer bottle between his hands. “Probably since that night you all got me out, when you wrapped up her leg and carried her off like she was your bride.”
“Well, she couldn’t exactly walk.”
“Right.”
He didn’t say anything else for a while, so I dared to keep going. “So you’re not upset?”
