Page 100 of Ezekiel
“You did,” I admitted with a heavy sigh. “I just didn’t give you an answer. I didn’t have one until the last few years, to be honest.”
“You have an answer? To what exactly?” Gideon asked.
“The reason I have to leave the room abruptly, or why I get quiet and, well, twitchy, in large crowds,” I continued.
“I always thought you were just… a bit slow,” Kai scoffed.
“Well, if I am, it’s neither here nor there,” I chuckled lightly. The tension in the room was thick to the point it was just making my anxiety worse. “I have a condition called misophonia.”
“Isn’t that the continent that split back in the dinosaur ages or something?” Ollie asked. If my eyes could have rolled any harder, I would have been able to see my brain.
“That’s Pangea, you nitwit,” Gideon sassed, smacking Ollie on the back of the head.
“No, no, wait. I’m thinking about that country or whatever in the Middle East,” Ollie insisted.
“Fucking hell, Ollie. That’s Mesopotamia. Christ, open a history book sometime,” I scoffed.
“Hey, watch it half-pint,” Ollie whined.
“Enough,” Delilah tersely scolded them both.
“Misophonia is a condition that affects my ears. I’m sensitive to sounds, particularly when it involves eating. Chewing and other things like that sound loud and obnoxious in my brain, but it goes beyond that,” I explained.
“Oh, like when someone can’t handle the sound of someone chewing gum,” Gideon said, understanding dawning on his face.
“Yes, exactly. That’s misophonia. But it’s a spectrum. Some people just get mildly annoyed, and then there are people like me. For me, it creates an anxiety so intense that I can’t breathe. I can’t focus. My skin crawls and my heart races until I’m in the middle of an anxiety attack that I just can’t control,” I continued.
“Which is why you run,” Levi concluded and I nodded my head.
“Yes, exactly. It makes things beyond difficult, but with Talia’s help, I’ve been able to manage it more in the last few weeks. It’s only the beginning, but it’s made a tremendous difference,” I admitted, taking her hand under the table again and squeezing it. She was my source of peace.
“Fuck, that makes a lot of sense,” Kai grumbled.
“Yeah, but it still sucks ass,” I chuckled.
“Okay, are we all a little better now?” Talia asked the group. There were affirmations and nods of agreement around the table. “Good. Now don’t any of you pull that shit in my house again. Got it?”
“Got it,” we all replied. Talia taking charge? New kink unlocked. Not that I could ever be a submissive, but perhaps letting her take the reins for a short while could be fun. I tucked that idea away for a rainy day.
“Now that we have that out of the way, us ladies had a nice talk in the other room and came up with a small, but attainable plan of action,” she continued on.
“Oh?” Levi asked, perking up in his seat. “Do tell. I’m all ears, because frankly, I couldn’t think of a damn thing that would work.”
“There is only one thing that we can really tie any of this to, and that’s my adoption. Everything is too foggy in my brain, with no actual facts to draw on. But we know I was taken. And we know a married couple here in Zion adopted me. The smartest course of action is to find out more about it. Which means, I need to go talk to my parents,” she stated with no small amount of dread tinging her voice.
“That sounds like a great idea, Talia. Is there anything that we can do to help?” Levi asked. It was almost odd to see him take a backseat to planning for once.
“Yes, actually. You, Ollie, and Zeke, in particular. Keep your eyes and ears peeled. The Elders have brought you three into the more inner circles of the church and of this community. You’ll likely hear and see more than any of the rest of us will. Anything that feels off, keep track of it. We should keep in contact regularly and keep a log of what we find,” she explained.
“Almost everything in Zion sounds off. This place is fucked up,” Gideon scoffed.
“You’re not wrong, but in particular, anything regarding adoptions or children will be noteworthy,” she continued. We all nodded in agreement before falling silent once more. It was a heavy topic.
“Well, I think with all of that being aired out and decided, we should probably make our way home,” Ruth suggested, squeezing Levi’s shoulder.
“Us, too,” Delilah agreed.
One by one, our guests left, leaving Talia and me with an empty house and a sink full of dishes. I inwardly rolled my eyes, remembering Gideon’s pandering about how he wasn’t afraid to do dishes. I would have to give him hell about it the next time I saw him.
