Page 90 of Gideon
“I have no idea what I want to do. I always thought I would stay home and be a wife and mother, but the thought of doing something else with my life? I don’t know. It sounds like it could suit me,” Ruth commented.
“I think you should go into helping people somehow. You’re so good at solving problems and listening to people, Ruth,” Talia interjected. “I want to do something similar, too. I just want to help people. Maybe help other kids who have been through trauma like I have.”
“That’s amazing, Talia,” I praised her. It was a big thing, to devote your life to something like that.
“Whatever we do, can we promise to at least stay in touch?” Delilah asked with a smile.
“Of course we will!” Talia readily agreed. “I mean, it’s not like we can keep the brothers apart.” The girls all chuckled at that comment, but I couldn’t bring myself to join them. They had all been lucky enough to fall in love with their husbands. When we left here, would I stay with Gideon? I had no idea. I had feelings for him, sure, but were they the kind of feelings that led to a lifetime of happiness together? It was too precarious to say at this point.
“You got quiet on us, Naomi. Is everything okay?” Ruth asked. She was an astute one, picking up on moods and expressions quickly.
“Yeah, everything is fine. I’m just thinking,” I waved off her question.
“Well, talk to us. We’re here,” Talia urged. Again, I waved the question off.
“Naomi, I know that you don’t know us all that well, and you know the brothers even less. But we are a safe place for you to talk, when you feel ready.” Ruth’s incredible kindness shone through her words, making me feel more comfortable than I probably ever had felt, save for specific times with Gideon.
“I just don’t know how to feel right now. You all are in love with your husbands, and that’s beautiful. But I barely know Gideon,” I sighed with exasperation.
“I felt the same way when Ollie and I got together,” Delilah commiserated. “Granted, he was persistent as hell and made me love him, regardless of how I felt about that fact in the beginning.”
“Oh, Levi was the polar opposite!” Ruth exclaimed with a laugh.
“He was?! But he’s so head over heels for you now!” Talia exclaimed, literally sitting on the edge of her seat, awaiting more details.
“Oh, he was horrible! He was all grouchy and moody. He would brood for hours, refusing to communicate with me, regardless of how much I demanded that he did,” Ruth chuckled.
“Youdemandedsomething of Levi? Ruth, you little devil you! That couldn’t have gone well,” Delilah teased Ruth with a grin.
“Oh, I definitely demanded it of him. And no, that didn’t go over well,” Ruth laughed. “Well, then again… maybe it did.” She threw us all a wink over the rim of her glass.
“The point is,” Talia interrupted amongst our giggles, “Getting to know your husband takes time. Give it time, Naomi. Gideon is a good guy.”
“I know he’s a good guy. Better than I could have hoped for, honestly. I just don’t know if what we have is enough to dedicate a whole life to. Part of me wants to cut ties with everything related to Zion and find a new life. But leaving Gideon also feels…” I trailed off, unsure of how to finish that particular thought.
“Impossible to imagine?” Ruth finished for me, a knowing look on her face.
“Yeah,” I agreed with a deep sigh.
“Take your time. And in the meantime, remember we are all here for you. Even for the tough bits,” she smiled kindly at me.
The conversation continued well into the afternoon. I fixed us all a pathetic-looking lunch of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, to which the girls all teased. Granted, the teasing was aimed mostly at Gideon and his utter lack of planning for a home. All in all, the day went well, filled with support and encouragement and far too much teasing.
As the girls left, I found myself grateful to have their friendship and support. Things would not get any easier as the pieces of this plan began to rapidly fall into place. More than anything else, I found myself looking forward to Gideon coming home for the day. Looking forward to getting to know my husband more, and figuring out just what the future would entail. Both for myself, and for the two of us.
CHAPTER22
GIDEON
The week was progressing faster than I wanted, and yet slow as fuck all at the same time. Father and the Reverend had moved me from the church to the build site in order to work. I knew what that place was intended for. I just had no proof. Levi had talked to me countless times already regarding the importance of finding the proof we needed that the structure was, in fact, intended to house the children that had been stolen, but there was just no hard proof to be found. It was a long cabin. While, according to the schematics, it did not look like a typical house, it also didn’t look nefarious to anyone who didn’t know what we knew.
As I drove home from the church, sweaty and filthy from working in the dirt all day, I found my thoughts wandering to Naomi. It had been a rough few weeks for her as well. Try as I might, nothing seemed to truly calm her. There was this sense about her that she wanted to run, that I just couldn’t seem to soothe. The ropes helped. Of course they did. But it wasn’t enough. I wanted to make her feel at peace and safe. Perhaps the reality was that she would never feel safe until she was away from Zion. Not that I could blame her for that notion for a single fucking second.
I pulled into the house, my eyes moving to the front door where Naomi stood waiting for me, a smile on her face. Christ, she was beautiful. Her long red hair, lightened by the summer’s sunlight, was down in loose waves that tumbled around her shoulders. She could be a model, in another time and place. She wore a cornflower blue dress that was a little too big on her, dipping down her chest and showing just enough of her cleavage to further whet my appetite. I wanted her all the time. Day and night. What concerned me was that I wanted more than just her body. I knew how I felt about her. I had told her as much as she slept. But these feelings I had… I just wasn’t sure if she returned them. I feared more than anything that when all was said and done, she would leave Zion behind her. And me along with it.
“Well hello there, wife,” I greeted her, bounding up to the front door with a smile on my face. “Did you have a good chat with the girls today?”
“I did. I really, really did,” she answered as I leaned in for a kiss. The smile on her face was genuine and real, filling me with a hope I had to keep squashing back down into the pits of my soul.
