Page 139 of Collateral Damage
“I feel stupid,” I confess.
“Don’t.” His grip on my hand tightens, and the pain in his eyes sharpens. “You don’t blame yourself, and I won’t blame myself. Deal?”
I nod. “Deal.”
“That guy was a coward, but you’re the bravest person I know.”
The lump in my throat swells. What did I do to deserve this man? He’s the most remarkable person and an incredible boyfriend, lover, and friend. He’s showing up as the partner I’ve wanted but didn’t believe existed for a type-A control freak like me.
I want to kick myself for not seeing this potential in him before. What if it had been me and him in college instead of me and Ethan? Would we have worked out? It’s hard to know… so much has changed, but I want to believe we would’ve found a way to make it work. How I felt for Ethan pales in comparison to how I feel for Cooper.
Ethan was like the sunset—beautiful and vibrant but fades fast. Cooper is the sunset, sunrise, sunshine, moonlight, and everything in between. He’severysource of light. I’ll never be in darkness again.
“You think I’m brave, huh?” I joke, trying to lighten the mood.
“Yes,” he says simply, as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “You’ve been through so much, more than most people will ever have to go through, and you’ve not let it break you. You always come out stronger.”
“I could say the same thing about you.”
He stares at me for a long moment, the energy between us charging. My pulse quickens, and his thumb brushes over my knuckles.
“I love you,” he says.
Those three little words are so big… big enough to change everything.
“Maybe this isn’t the best time to say it,” he says, hanging his head but keeping our eyes locked. “But I can’tnotsay it, not anymore. I love you, Sybil. I have loved you for as long as I can remember, and I will love you until I cease to exist. Loving you is a part of me that can never be removed.”
My body buzzes, happiness squashing fear until all I can feel is joy and gratitude.
“I love you, too.”
He lets out a breathy sigh, pressing a gentle kiss to my lips, his mouth lingering against mine.
“Say it again?” he whispers.
“I love you, Cooper.”
He grins. “You have no idea how long I’ve wanted you to say that to me.”
“Oh, really?” I tease.
He nods against my forehead. “I’ve kind of had a crush on you since we were kids.”
“Only kind of?”
“Okay, more than a crush.”
We kiss again, and I feel safer than I have in as long as I can remember. This isrightand good and inevitable and meant to be. Now that I’ve got him, I’m never going to let him go.
Sixty
Sybil
Present - Age 27
The High Line stretches ahead of me and Arden, the autumn leaves beginning to show off their colors. There are so many things to love about Manhattan in the fall, and this spot is one of my favorites.
“What’s on your mind?” Arden asks, her voice soft as we walk side by side. “Is it the attack?”
