Page 85 of Arranged Obsession
“I swear, feather. I’ll never hold you against your will. I’ll never hurt you.”
She shakes her head. “Fucking nuts,” she whispers and glares at me. “Talking about myself. But you’re pretty bad too.”
She lingersoutside of the shrine as I step inside and look around. Dozens of memories assault me. “We’re here,” she says uneasily. “Still feels weird. All this stuff.”
“I remember every life,” I say quietly. I lift a movie ticket stub in the air. “I took this after killing an addict that assaulted one of our dealers.” I gesture at an empty Diet Coke can. “This was after I killed a member of a small biker group that was harassing a bar owner under our protection.” I smile down at a tiny screwdriver. “I found this in your kitchen. I took it after I killed a man who stole money from one of our drivers. He was a real piece of shit.”
She gazes over the hundreds of items. “All of these happened after one of your jobs?”
“All of them,” I confirm, gently putting the ticket back where it belongs. “They’re mementos of a sort. They’re a way to repent for what I’ve done.”
“By stealing from me?”
“Think of it like taking a relic from a saint.”
She shakes her head. “Not the same.”
“Not to you, maybe.” I move deeper into the room. She doesn’t follow. “I’m good at what I do. I help my family. I have purpose. But the killings weigh on my soul. Visiting you and taking a piece of your life was how I kept myself light again.”
“Feather,” she whispers softly.
I smile and nod. “Exactly. My feather. I tried not to disturb you too much. I know I didn’t do a good job.”
“You did not.”
“But I never wanted to bother you.”
“How did you get around all my security?”
“Patience. Skill.” I smile to myself, remembering all the close calls. “Lots of luck.”
She looks around the room, crossing her arms. “You still haven’t explained the important part.”
I turn to face her. My beautiful wife. The only clean part of me. “I met you in Philadelphia seven years ago.”
She looks confused. “I don’t remember you.”
“I was stalking a drug addict at the time. He was a fucking piece of shit. Beat his girlfriend half to death. Stole all her cash. Blew it on drugs. Unfortunately for him, his girlfriend was the daughter of a member of our clan, and offenses like that aren’t tolerated. He tried to run to Philadelphia when he heard I was looking for him, but he didn’t get far.”
Bianca’s lips push together. I’m desperate for their taste. I’d do anything to feel them again. But I can’t push. I can’t rush. If I’m going to stay clean, I have to be patient, and I can do that. I have a lot of practice.
Seven long years of it.
“How do I come into the picture?”
“I was stalking him at first. Getting a feel for where he was staying. I’m good at my job because I’m thorough and I don’t take chances.”
“Like you didn’t with the Russians?”
“Exactly, you’re exactly right to bring that up.” I smile to myself at the memory, absently brushing my fingers over the little treasures around me. “That prick was running around Phillyindulging his excesses again. Even though he knew I was on his tail, he couldn’t help it. But eventually, he ran out of money, and that’s when he found you.”
Bianca looks confused. “I don’t know anything about this.”
“No, you don’t. But I remember it clearly. You were walking home from what I came to learn later was Grace House. It must’ve been one of your earliest shifts. I was following my target that night, keeping back, waiting for a good chance, when he happened to spot you. I’ll never forget that night.” I close my eyes, breathing deep, smelling the oil and the garbage, the reek of Philly’s back alleys. “He was going to rob you. I suspect he was going to kill you too, at least if everything went wrong. And under normal circumstances, I would’ve let him.”
“Sorry, what now?” Her eyebrows raise.
“I don’t take chances. It wasn’t a good time to make my move. Too many unknowns, too many variables. Anyone could’ve walked down that street and found us. There could’ve been cameras.”
