Page 15 of Spellbound
Instantly, she seemed to relax. “That is precisely the sort of response I had hoped you would have. I realize that I was responsible for much of this. I introduced the two of you. I was the one who said that you would have to marry—and now I feel a bit concerned because, with the meddling I promised her that I would not do, I have put my friend in a situation with no other way out. I have experienced no small degree of misgivings after the fact.”
He was fairly certain she wasn’t the only one. It was very likely that he was the only one who was entirely sure of this course of action. He would take whatever steps were necessary to ensure that she would be his forever. That seemed vital to his very existence in a way that defied reason. Perhaps, he thought, it truly was some sort of spell or curse. But it was one that he welcomed. For years, he’d been wandering without a purpose. The last months, supporting his sister as she grieved, had shown him just how lost he’d been. It had all simply been by rote. Every day was the same. Correspondence, business matters, afternoons at his club and evenings at the theater or some party or other. But they had all blurred together into one thing—indistinct from one another. He’d been sleepwalking until he’d met her. Now he was wide awake, wide awake and ready for whatever life had to bring him.Carpe diem.He was seizing the day. And he was seizing a chance for something he hadn’t even believed could exist.
Belladonna walkedinto the drawing room and found what appeared to be a somewhat tense situation. Cordial. But tense. “Have I interrupted something?”
“Only a discussion,” Eugenie insisted. She reached for a heavy velvet cloak that was draped over the back of the settee. “Take this. Millworthy’s rheumatism predicts we will have a storm later.”
Bella didm’t have to accept the cloak. Desmond did it for her, taking the garment from Genie and draping it about her shoulders.”Thank you,” she murmured.
“You are quite welcome. Let’s be off,” he urged.
Genie walked them to the door, embracing Bella quickly. “I have a very good feeling about this, Bella. You’re not the only one with intuition.”
Desmond was holding out his hand to help her into the carriage. Her fingers trembled slightly as she placed her hand in his and allowed him to aid her. When she was seated, he climbed in behind her and took the seat opposite.
He offered her a reassuring smile. “If there is to be a storm, we should make haste. Perhaps we will be lucky enough to get there and back before it arrives.”
No Goodwynne has ever had luck of that nature.
“Then perhaps it is a good thing your name will be Crane by noon.”
Bella looked up, stunned to realize she’d spoken her woeful thought aloud. “I should not have said that. It’s hardly an auspicious way to start this particular day, is it?”
“You’re entitled to a bit of nerves,” he said. “It would be unnatural if you were not somewhat apprehensive.”
Guard your heart. The only way to keep him safe is to guard your heart.Steeling herself, Belladonna simply nodded. “Naturally. Thank you for being so understanding.” With that, she lapsed into silence, uncertain what to say to him and uncertain how she would maintain the distance that was so necessary for his safety and hers.
FIFTEEN
They reached Nottingham by ten. Had a license in hand shortly after and by eleven, were standing before a cleric in St. Mary’s Cathedral. The coachman and the cleric’s wife acted as their witnesses and the ceremony was painfully brief. Indeed, when it was all said and done, the whole of it took only a matter of minutes. How strange, Desmond thought, that something so momentous in one’s life could be over practically within the blink of an eye.
Ushering Belladonna out of the church and back to the waiting landau, he saw her eyeing the simple gold band he’d placed on her finger. Edwina had given it to him the night before. It had been their mother’s. She’d never worn it, preferring instead to wear the ring Thomas had given her that had been in his family for generations. Putting it on her finger had felt right. Destined, even.
“If you’d like something else, we can visit any jeweler in town. Or if you prefer, we can get something from London,” he told her.
“Oh, no! No. This ring is lovely. I’ve never worn anything so fine. I feel rather like a fish out of water in my borrowed finery and wearing something so precious on my hand,” she said.
“Belladonna, we have never had a chance to discuss my financial situation. But you should know, I have been very successful in my business endeavors. Successful enough that you need never worry about such things again. It is my fondest hope that you will soon grow quite accustomed to having a bit of luxury. Heaven knows you’ve earned it given all you’ve been put through.”
She looked at him with an expression that he couldn’t quite read. “I have never wanted for anything. I may not have been able to indulge in luxuries as you say, but I never did without. I never went hungry or had to worry about having a roof over my head. It may not seem like much, but I do love my little cottage. I’ve been very happy to live there.”
He leaned forward taking her hadn’t in his, rubbing his thumb over the gold band on her finger. “Would you be happy to reside with me at Highwood Abbey?”
“With your sister?”
Desmond shook his head. “No. Edwina has decided that the memory of Thomas looms too large for her in that house. Or rather the memory of what she and Thomas should have shared in all the years to come. She means to take a residence in the village proper. Something smaller and easier for her to manage on her own or with only a modicum of staff. I think she craves a bit of solitude.”
“And my cottage?”
Desmond smiled even as he settled her hand more firmly in his. It wasn’t simply to grasp it but to twine their fingers together in an intimate way, in a way that stated very clearly that he intended for them to be close. Closer, perhaps, than she realized. “It is your cottage, Belladonna. I cannot profess to know all it is that you do, but I know that it is part of who you are. And I would not interfere in that for all the world. I do not want you to feel that marrying me means sacrificing something else. I wouldgive you the world if I could. Granting—no, that isn’t quite right. It isn’t mine to grant, is it? Choosing not to interfere with your independence and your life’s work is surely the very least I can do.”
“You must stop,” she whispered, her voice cracking with emotion.
“What am I doing to you that is so wrong, Belladonna?”
“I can’t love you,” she said. “I won’t. And at every turn you are doing all that you can to make that an impossible vow to keep.”
“Then do not. Do not keep such a silly vow. Whatever you fear, we can face it together,” he urged her. “That is what marriage is. You are my wife. The only woman whom I have ever considered spending the remainder of my days with. I have never even been tempted until I met you.”
