Page 126 of Forbidden Billionaires: Vol. 8
“Indeed. They’ll make a great match.”
“How?” She stared at me like I was crazy.
Did she seriously not see it? “Because they’re the same. They both have basic ass names. They’re both super awkward. And they’re both gingers.”
Chastity watched in horror as Mike and Ash made their way to their table. Mike tripped and caught the edge of a tablecloth, sending two diners’ dinners right onto the floor. Instead of apologizing, he just pretended it wasn’t him and caught up with Ash.
“Good Lord,” said Chastity. “They really are the same person. #Twinsies.”
“I know, right? They’re very compatible.” But obviously opposites were a better true love match. This was for sure lesser.
Ash and Mike sat down and started talking.
“Damn, we should have mic’d the table,” I said.
“Don’t worry, master, we can guess what they’re saying.” Nigel cleared his throat. And then when Ash started talking, Nigel filled in her words with what he assumed she was saying: “Oh, yes, my womb is very ready because of my favorite boy’s green juice.” His voice was very high-pitched while he mimicked her.
Chastity made a grossed out face. But then started filling in Mike’s reply in a deep voice. “I bet your womb is so ready for my sperm, baby.”
“Call me baby again,” Nigel said in his high-pitched voice.
“Baby, we’re going to make the most beautiful ginger babies.”
“How about you coitus me right on the table, you well-hung hunk.”
“You’re about to see how well-hung I am,” said Chastity. “I hope you love elephant trunk.”
Nigel’s eyes lit up. “I don’t think I could handle such a trunk.”
“Once you go trunk, you never go back.”
What the actual fuck were they talking about right now? “That’s not what they’re saying.”
“It might be,” said Nigel.
I shook my head. Mike and Ash had stopped talking. They were both awkwardly hiding behind their menus. “I’m not sure they have any chemistry.”
“Baby, we have so much chemistry,” Nigel said as soon as Ash started talking again.
“Are you ready to taste my trunk?” said Chasitity. “We’ll start slow. Just the tip.”
“I don’t know if I can handle it.”
“I’ll be gentle with you.”
That definitely wasn’t what Mike and Ash were saying. But it was oddly turning me on.
“I need to go check on them,” I said. “Nigel, switch disguises with me.”
Nigel looked horrified. “But...Francois is moi alter-ego!”
“Please, Nigel. I need to know how the date is going.”
“Fine.” Nigel pulled out a suitcase and handed me a dress shirt and a wig. Then he took off his apron and handed it to me. “But don’t do anything weird to tarnish my reputation.”
I quickly changed my shirt and tied the apron behind my back. “Do I need a different stache?”
“No, that one will do. Chastain, adjust his wig please.”
