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And suddenly something clicked and it all came back to me. The minotaur. It had been real! Him. The labyrinth. The lotus party. Spaceboy. Archer, Vandal, and Mustang. And the minotaur some more...

WAIT!I suddenly realized why the minotaur’s tattoos had looked so familiar. I glanced at Cole’s naked body. Then back to the gif of me getting fucked.

Oh shit.

Cole was the minotaur. And I really had fucked him.Twice.

Not only that, but I’d promised to show Mr. Frost photos of what that minotaur mask had been for. And the only photos I had of it were me getting gangbanged.Gah!

I turned to Chastity. “Um, Chastity? Can we please talk in private for a moment?”

“It would be more fun to talk not in private.” She glanced down at the two cocks in her hands. “And you could really use a shower to wash all that skeet off.”

What?!

“For real,” said Cole. He pointed up to the TV screen. There was a gif of me with cum dripping down my chin taking a selfie surrounded by naked statue men all posing like Greek statues. “Come on in,” said Cole. “Daddy will clean you up.”

I cringed and turned back to Chastity. “It’s an emergency! Please.”

Chastity sighed. “Okay, but only because I’m the best maid of honor ever.” She dropped the cocks and walked out. She grabbed a towel. I thought she was going to wrap it around herself for modesty, but instead she just wrapped it around her hair like a turban.

I pulled her into my bedroom.

“What’s up?” she asked.

“What’s up? WHAT’S UP?! How can you ask that so casually when my life is in shambles?! How could you let this happen to me?!”

“Oh. Did you not get enough cocks? I’m sure we can stay one more day.”

Why would she think that’s why I was upset?! I’d had enough random penises for one lifetime. “I just had a videochat with Mr. Frost. And I promised I’d show him pictures of how we used that minotaur mask for a saucy little boudoir shoot.” I pointed over to the stupid mask in the corner. “But all the pictures that involve that mask also involve a giant penis inside of me!”

“I think you mean penises. Plural.” She tried to high five me, but I swatted her hand down. Which I guess kind of just ended up being a high five. “Speaking of penises…have you heard from Tanner?”

“Why would I hear from Tanner? Because I went against his rules again and fucked his friend Cole?” Tanner was never going to speak to me again. My life truly was in shambles. I felt as dramatic as Nigel when he was worried about being cancelled.

“No, silly. You’d hear from him because you probably just set him free! I mean…odds are at least one of those penises belonged to your lesser true love. I’m betting it was Cole.”

Holy shit! Did I just free Tanner?

I shook my head.No. Definitely not.Because he would have called if he was free.Right?He definitely didn’t respond to my wishes to be left alone during my sham of an engagement. Until recently, at least. If he was free, he’d surely contact me immediately. He’d try to fight for me. He’d do anything in his power to stop this fake engagement. I knew it. I knew he still loved me too. It was true love. But I couldn’t say any of that to Chastity. Instead I had to say: “I don’t care if Tanner gets free.”

Chastity frowned. “How can you say that?! You love him.”

“I hate his stupid old soul.” I wanted to cry saying the words out loud. I loved his beautiful old soul. “All I care about is what pictures I can show to Mr. Frost that won’t make him call off the wedding.”Because that’s how I’m actually going to free Tanner.It was my last hope.

Chastity threw her hands up in the air. “You can’t be serious.”

“Of course I’m serious! I need innocent pictures, stat. And you have to help me because you’re my maid of honor.”

Chastity groaned. “You’re being such a bridezilla.”

I didn’t think being a bridezilla meant being upset that you cheated on your fiancé all night long. “Chastity, please.”

She sighed. “Girl, it’s fine. We’ll just take some new pics this afternoon. I know a great photographer on the Amalfi Coast. Let me give him a call.”

Oh, duh. I totally should have thought of that.But in my defense, I’d apparently gotten blackout drunk last night, so I wasn’t functioning at full capacity.

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