“No one here goes by that name, good sir,” I said in an indescribable accent again. “And this never happened! Avert your eyes or die!” God, why had I just threatened him?!
But it was now or never. I pushed myself up off the ground and tugged my skirt down to try to salvage what was left of my modesty. Although my thong still caught on my heel wasn’t doing me any favors in that department. I tried to kick it under the counter, but it just looked like I was doing a sexy little dance for him.
Fortunately he was still trying to block me from his view.
I lunged for the bottle of wine. I grabbed one of the straps of my bra and pulled it. A little too hard.
The wine bottle slid across the counter.
No!I climbed onto the counter to try and stop it.
But I reached out a second too late. The bottle flung through the air. Matt wasn’t looking so he had no chance of blocking it.
The wine bottle collided with the front of his pants. Hard.
“Oof,” Matt said.
The bottle fell to the ground and shattered.
No.I’d already set Matt’s dick on fire. And now I’d smashed it with a wine bottle. No dick should ever be mutilated so much. Unless it was a bad dick. Like a rapey one. And Matt wasn’t a bad person. It wasn’t his fault that I always acted terrible around him. I cringed as Matt groaned. After the fire and the smashing, there was probably barely anything left of his dick at this point.
He grabbed his junk and bent over.
And now his hand couldn’t block the view of me.
I was on my knees on the counter. Tits everywhere and ass out again because this skirt sucked. It looked like I was crawling toward him in a very seductive manner.
There was no lake. Or bush to hide in. But there was another option. I jumped off the counter, sprinted through the great room, and slammed into the window overlooking Central Park.
And everything went dark.
***
I slowly opened my eyes. Matt was standing over me with a concerned expression on his face.
I screamed and grabbed my exposed breasts.
But they weren’t exposed anymore. He’d laid a blanket over me. An icepack slid off my forehead and onto the ground. Matt was also holding an icepack to the front of his pants.
“What’s happening right now?” I whispered, hoping this was somehow a nightmare and not my real life.
Matt pulled his eyebrows together. “You slammed into the window and bounced off. Fortunately.”
“Oh. Right.” It all came flooding back. I looked over at the window. Maybe a second go would be more successful...
“Ash, did you just try to kill yourself to get away from me?”
“What? NO.”
“It kind of seems like you wanted to hurl your body through that window.”
“I was aiming for the fire escape.”
“We’re like 80 stories up. There is no fire escape.”
“Well, I did not know that.” I slowly sat up. Despite the fact that I’d body slammed the glass, I felt decent.
“Here.” He handed me a folded t-shirt.